Hey Jeff.. yes, its 9th Jan already! I thought you were going for MC in teh New Year! C'mon... have you asked her again, directly recently? And have you found a suitable MC? And is she happy with your choice?
Dont keep your eyes open for it.. ask her when she can make an MC apppointment.. stop skirting around it !!!!
The last time I talked about it we "agreed" that it would most likely be during her next schedule, which I don't think she will get until late next week, at the earliest. Then she wants to add her other commitments. That's the part that I might short circuit. Or, since I can be flexible, ask her to make the arrangements. Though I think I know how well that would work.
But what if the MC cant make the times she suggests to you?? As in this country, you have to book IC/MC at least a week or two weeks in advance (is it the same there?). How about even if thats not the case.. you find out what slots the MC has and then TELL HER what the options are for next week/the week after that and ask her to let YOU know which is suitable, as soon as she knows her schedule, so you can book it?
That way you are not waiting around again for her to deem to let you know her movements and maybe you look the man and take a bit of teh control back? And no, dont ask her to make the arrangements!!! It will never happen.
Sorry Jeff, but I'm 100% with Ali on this one. As a great commercial says......JUST DO IT!!! Your W will never get off her butt and do it. She is apparently just fine with the status quo. Again, she is getting everything she wants while you get NOTHING!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
She gets four weeks of schedule at a time, so as long as I get that in good order I should be able to schedule something. I have to admit, part of me doesn't really care. But I try to make that part shut up!
S20 and at least one other guy in his unit were activated late for their deployment, and until two days ago were doing stuff at the reserve center (still active), Toys for Tots stuff, and who knows what. Anyway, his orders had him active for what appeared to be one day short of a year, which, according to him, significantly reduced the GI Bill benefits he would be eligible for. Last weekend his buddy sent him a text... "2008 was leap year". They kept quiet, and went to the personnel office to process out Wednesday. The person filling out the paperwork started to put in 364 days, S20 said, no, that's wrong.... They disagreed, he said, "Let's get the calendar." Went through it all, added it up, and what do you know, 365 days! So the form that counts says one year, rather than a day short.
Most of the time the dog gets you, but now and then, you get the dog!
Jeff, wow you're over 9000 posts. You're definitely the guy with the long term experience here.
I'm working on a theory. It is;
One person in the couple wants to work on things, make them better, put in the time, effort and energy to make it an awesome relationship. Searches the internet for interesting articles & forums for growth & learning.
The other person doesn't want to. They want to complain that the their spouse is never satisfied.
What do you think ?
Could I have a hot buttered rum. It's freezing here.
Hugs
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
