I was reading your post and thinking what a wonderful Christmas you were having until you posted about what your ex demanded what the kids write to ow.
That is just too much. I feel for the kids.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
That did throw me for a loop, but it did turn around.
My kids got home at about 5 p.m.
They did not look that happy.
I asked what had happened.
Ex and OW got in a fight after the Christmas at the in laws.
Apparently one of ex's uncles decided to show home movies of previous Christmas'
I was in every one.....
Kids loved seeing me, they laughed had fun, etc....
OW became upset on the drive home
started throwing things at my ex in the car in front of the kids
using bad language.
kids came home and snuggled with me.
Kids admire and respect me.
God is good.
Time for me to trust God more.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Amazing that he showed videos which had YOU in them but if ow wants to be with him, she is going to have to accept the fact that you are irreplaceable and the mother of his kids.
I am sorry your kids had to see them arguing but at the same time I want to laugh that he would show videos in which you were in all of them.
That R will never last.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
There are some things that will always be. WE always will be "the first" there is no getting around it.
As WE move into this new place I will be holding onto that. NOT the loss of what it was -but what came out of it. My children and much good for me.
The OW and other bimbos that will or will not come in and out of play are going to have to ride a way different ride with them. I TRULY do believe that we (I) got the best years of my x.
They made some real crappy decisions that are starting a ride for them that is filled with unrest. The lie they have bought into does not bring any long term joy. I know how they run - mine is an expert. I know how they manipulate adn lie..i swear mine wrote the book.... AND BECAUSE of that the ride they are choosing will be filled with emotional (INNER because the outer will shine)...but inner emotional turmoil. And truthfully - it is sad.
HAVE A WONDERFUL day T. You to MWG.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
He has not had the kids at all except for a couple of hours on Christmas.
Does not even inquire about them.
Has no plans to see them soon.
Kids are more clingy with me.
Something is going on.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Oh yeah, he is not following his court visitation schedule at all. He has always stuck to this like glue.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I am sure Trusting that the holidays were much time for reflection. How could he not miss what he once had. Maybe he is revealing to himself life is just not that grand and I don't want anyone to see me all down and depressed.
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
There are so many emotions going on with everyone this time of year.
I am looking forward to the New Year and calling it a fresh start.
I hope and pray good things happen for you and your kids.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
He is trying to justify OW to the kids and his family.
Is this not the sickest thing? "
Trusting, Why do you assume this? Probably it is NOT about you. I am betting this is far less about you and much more about H and OW.
It sounds as if their R has moved into the realm of non-fairy tale and is on the road to self-destruction. Next year this time is likely to be very different for your H.
M: 16 years Bomb 4/07 OW 20s long gone Divorced 11/09 I remarried New Guy Cooperative r w/X regarding D