Sounds like good advice,but it has been very hard to keep my lips sealed and only respond ater i put thought to it. Why is she telling me to be patient,but not telling me she is coming home,is she waiting for her guilt to go away or does she see the pain in my eyes.
Sounds like good advice,but it has been very hard to keep my lips sealed and only respond ater i put thought to it.
Sure, it's hard. This whole damned THING is hard -- probably the hardest thing you've ever had to do. But if you can't learn NOT TO REACT, when it's in your interest to do so, you're never going to get anywhere.
Learn to say:
"I'm sorry you feel that way."
"I don't want to talk about this right now."
"I'm not prepared to talk about this at the moment."
Very true I just need to set my mind on the little battles and try to win those instead trying to win the whole war. From now on I will use your advice step back and let her ride in that roller coaster she in now,and who knows maybe it will stop right here at home an if not at least I know its not what she wanted. This is the hardest I done in my life and I been to Iraq 3 times. Would do 3 more tours if I could avoid the pain I am in now. Ineed to stay focused and listen to the good advice I am recieving here
It is very natural to want to see instant results, but that just is not going to happen.
Do your best to listen to PDT... he gives great advice and he has been there before!
It is hard and it is unfair, and you have every right to be angry. However, someone has to do the right thing and keep things together - and at this point that person is YOU.
Yes I am in the service!! I did tell her that before I think she doesnt want to come back now till the pain is gone she does not ant to deal with it. She tells me she does nothing but work and come home and can I please stop talking about what happened with other women it is over(So I did that).She tels me she cant come home when I want her to but when she is ready she feels that right now we are not ready. I guess I am afraid that she doesnt mean it but I can tell by her eyes that she is in pain and seems that she realizes what she has done
I made it through another week,this was a hard one.My wife is told meafter I asked what is the hardest part why you cant come home: " I can not give you what you need right now". I asked do you even love me,and she said she dont know and can not answer that right now, but lets not rush the divorce. It hurt but I didnt respond. I would like some advice what sh is saying to me
