He is on meds which settle his hypochondriac symptoms. But I think starting 2 years ago, his anxiety on his body has switched to anxiety about ME! Which is why I mentioned a psychiatrist to him. Huge Veto on that one.
SISTER!!! Sorry I didn't see this til just now. Okay. I had a bit of a rough night last night, but things are s-l-o-w-l-y improving. So don't go by what you read about me just TODAY. LOL.
Hypochondria...yes I know of this. Anxiety is very difficult to handle...it's contagious!! I finally decided this year that just because HE has anxiety disorder, doesn't mean I have to!
What meds does he take? My H takes Paxil right now. But he says he doesn't need it.
He takes Zoloft and has now decided to REDUCE the mg. He's been on the whole spectrum of meds for over 10 years now. Countless ER trips for panic attacks. He had one last week in front of my son after our big "our marriage is done talk"...FABULOUS.
My daughter is typical teen - personality of H, but has my sense of humor.
Son is anxious like H - but is the most hilarious creature on the face of the planet.
He asked me a couple weeks ago why I said "I do"? and i said honey - i have no idea, but thank GOD I got you out of the deal.
He takes Zoloft and has now decided to REDUCE the mg. He's been on the whole spectrum of meds for over 10 years now. Countless ER trips for panic attacks. He had one last week in front of my son after our big "our marriage is done talk"...FABULOUS.
My daughter is typical teen - personality of H, but has my sense of humor.
Son is anxious like H - but is the most hilarious creature on the face of the planet.
He asked me a couple weeks ago why I said "I do"? and i said honey - i have no idea, but thank GOD I got you out of the deal.
My H cuts his pill in half. That's as much as he's willing to take. He said if he takes a whole one...it gives him this "weird euphoric feeling." I said...um...happiness?
He's been going thru cancer treatment for the last 6 months so that has had our hands full. And I have to tell you, our joke now is that thank God he's a hypochondriac, because it saved his life!
I wish you well, peace. Read Divorce Remedy...keep posting. A year ago I hated my husband. Now I sort of love him, I do believe he loves me...we have a lot of work to do, but I think it can be done.
At the very least, if it doesn't work out in the long run I will know I did everything I could. I've seen here that divorce adds to the problems. Imagine dealing with him as an EX.
My H didn't know I existed the first 12 years...so I know exactly how you feel. not good. That's the time period where i 'left go' of H and became more independent and HAD to become stronger and stand on my own 2 feet.
Then this weird change of heart thing occured a couple years ago and all the smothering happened. Makes me wanna turn around and run far far away.
My H didn't know I existed the first 12 years...so I know exactly how you feel. not good. That's the time period where i 'left go' of H and became more independent and HAD to become stronger and stand on my own 2 feet.
Then this weird change of heart thing occured a couple years ago and all the smothering happened. Makes me wanna turn around and run far far away.
I know what you mean about adapting to the being ignored, and then it just feels uncomfortable when they center on you. I mostly just wanted my H to stop being so mean.
It's a long journey for feelings to come back. And mine have been compromised from the first year on. I do the work for the kids' sake. Which has benefited me as well.
I want to tell you any decision you make is yours and yours alone. I'm not going to try to convince you you have to work on the M or anything. I think that if you are here, you still wonder a bit if there IS something that could change the way you feel.
I'd say...well, you can always get divorced. That's always still there. So you can try some other things first. If you're willing.
I've been thinking about splitting for a very long time, but never told him - for fear of his reaction due to his twisted way of thinking. I got the nerve to tell him, finally because I am so TIRED of feeling like I'm in a hole.
My huge thing is I have absolutely no, zero, zippo attraction for him. NONE. He's a big turn-off for me, actually.
Is this normal? Does THAT feeling come back? I don't see how it possibly could. So much damage has been done and I see him in a completely different light.
I've been thinking about splitting for a very long time, but never told him - for fear of his reaction due to his twisted way of thinking. I got the nerve to tell him, finally because I am so TIRED of feeling like I'm in a hole.
My huge thing is I have absolutely no, zero, zippo attraction for him. NONE. He's a big turn-off for me, actually.
Is this normal? Does THAT feeling come back? I don't see how it possibly could. So much damage has been done and I see him in a completely different light.
Yes, it's normal. Yes, it can come back.
It doesn't seem possible. You could never have convinced me. I had the added complication of an OM. In fact I didn't WANT the feeling to come back. The thing is you can't really try to have feelings come back. You can try working on the relationship and working on yourself...and then the feelings are byproducts of that. Just like losing them was a byproduct of the way the relationship was before.
I didn't really TRY to let go of him. I just did. And I remember the very second it happened...I was home on New Years Eve and had a house full of kids (their friends were over for the occasion) H was at a friends house a couple miles away during the evening and decided not to come home. No phone call, no help with the kids, nothing...on New Year's Eve.
I remember the distinct thought in my head. WELL, I'M ALONE. I'M COMPLETELY ALONE. That's when I let go. All my dependence on him was out the door - never to return.
So then 2 years after that he realizes what he's done? too little, too late?
