My husband and I've been seeing each other just about every weekend.
With his new work schedule, 7 am to 7 pm, 6 days a week, he's going to need his one day off to himself. Laundry, buying groceries, relaxing.
Which means I probably won't be seeing him.
My DBing self says that now that things are going great for us, I am calling too often again. That I should take this opportunity to go back to loving detachment. That he's going to be stressed and unhappy with work and the more I'm calling, the more likely he'll blame me for his unhappiness again.
I might be borrowing trouble here...whacha think?
I'll back off for a bit and see what happens. Ooo...but it's hard to back off when things are going great!
PnT,
With the new bonding you share with positive OR talks and H having read and now understands DBing, you are on a different level than before.
The best thing to do is to ask what he wants. First validate how you understand how his new work schedule is going to put more demands on his personal time and has the potential of creating more stress for him. Follow it up with you don't want to contribute to that stress, so you are not sure if you are calling to often. Give him a chance to offer the solution to the situation so you will both be on the same page with the expectations.
Best way to avoid misinterpretations of the others actions is to keep an open line of communication ... even if that is on the subject of "how to communicate?"!
Better than reacting to mindreading such as:
Quote: Which means I probably won't be seeing him ... or ... the more likely he'll blame me for his unhappiness again
Ooo, thank you for pointing out my ASSumptions!