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Wow W2G.


Glad to hear from you, but that last part is cruddy, isn't it...

I am glad you found a place to live and that you are moving forward with your life. I don't think your concerns are 'much ado about nothing' at all. If you have made such a simple request and he cannot/will not honor it, i do think that is disrespectful.

I hope you really enjoy your new place.

Dear Where,

I'm so glad to hear from you, I've been wondering about how you've been! Congratulations on finding a new place, good luck with your move!

Your H sounds *really* confused. Why does he say "our room" but not "our myspace"? I hope he finds the courage and strength to face his own self, and own life, and embrace it all as part of one, coherent self. I hope he finds the courage to celebrate his love for you and your daughter, and not keep you seperate.



Wow, maybe I am misreading, but that doesn't sound like someone who wants permanent separation. It sounds like someone who is really confused. Has he told you why he still has the urge to leave? What is it that drives him away? It sounds like he is being reptilian (passionate marriage talk) here... fleeing instead of growing up??? But it really sounds, to me, like he is asking you for more time while he works through his stuff, because he wants to work things out with you.

Are you still up for waiting? Do you see him/feel him doing work to move himself forward? Is he in therapy? Are you in therapy? Would you ever go to therapy together?

big hugs to you, where. Keep us posted.
LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE
T

ps are you doing any yoga lately?

(((W2G)))

I'm just wondering, insteading of demanding to be involved in his FB activity (which isn't working because he is digging his heals in) is there some way of integrating yourself so in the end he *wants* to add you as a friend. He has got used to keeping it a secret and hiding it. I wonder if this is a plac e to set some goals? Michelle writes a whole chapter in DR on online activity. This may be a longer route than sudden disclosure but if you want this it may be the route you have to take. Just my thoughts...

I agree with the others, it doesn't sound like he wants a permanent separation. It sounds like he has fallen into bad habits and ways of thinking. I love what T highlighted. So telling.

Hey!!! Good to hear from you!!

So, do you have a deadline when all this should stop or you are going to let it "die" out?

A question for you: are you soft spoken, sensitive, a people's pleaser type of person?
xxx
K

((((Beautiful Where)))))

I'm sorry to hear that yur H seems to think the S is permanent now, especially when you were spending so much more time together. I guess I would just say perhaps to not believe anything the WAS says. He may still be struggling with internal turmoil.....

Having said that, if you are ready to move on, go for it. You are a gorgeously beautiful and talented woman who's going to set the world on fire!

L. xx

W2G,
I'm so glad you found a place to live closer to work. It will make things so much easier for you. When will you be moving?

I know how you feel with the FB account being kept secret from you. I have also asked my H for full disclosure of FB, email accounts but he hasn't. This has caused me to build more walls because I still don't trust him. For the time being though, I have decided to let go of all that. I am hoping that if trust is SLOWLY reestablished, H's need for secret accounts will disappear. I may be fooling myself but demanding that he disclose them has not worked either.

Hi W2G. Nice to read that the real estate portion of your sitch seems to be moving in the right direction. As you know, I have been where you are today...most of us have. The only thing I can say is yes it hurts but it hurts less and less as you continue to detach. I am not all the way there yet and at times I wonder what it will take to get there. Feelings linger but eventually, like some folks on this board, we will find someone new and the old will become less appealing.
On the FB thing and secrecy or trust in general. I understand where you are coming from. The fact that he refuses to share that part of his "life" is cause for some concern.
I am not really sure what your goal or expectations are going forward....but it all boils down the the same questions (for me anyway):
Are you in or out and is FB a deal breaker.
Hope you feel better today my fellow Canadian....spring is around the corner!!!!

Hey W2G, lovely to hear from you!

Whats the current state with you and him then? Are you S and not in physical contact, but you see him with your D, or are yuo kind of seeing each other, but he wont commit to being back in an R with you or letting his friends and FBers know that?

He isnt being fair no, and you have been exrtrodinarily patient.. but I agree with T.. when I read it, I wasnt picking up that he was 'done' and your S is permanent, seems he was asking for more time. Must be so maddening for you.

Have you got, or had, a DB coach? I just wondered what you could do differnetly maybe. Mine (Jody) was amazing, despite the money it costs, I'd reccomend it. Glad you posted and your house is sold!

Al xxx

Dearest (((((W2G))))),

I missed you!

Just wanted to give you a ((((HUG)))).