Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis ok its time to post

Well I just ghosted three calls from my W. She left a message claiming to need a receipt for a purchase that I made her. This smells fishy. "Will you leave it in an envelope between the screen door and the main door."

AAAHH silly little mlcer, though trix are for kids,(the ones you hang out with)...Yeah sure so you can use your key and open the main door. I'll get right on that one, in say.....NEVER.

I shouldn't being saying things like this, however she shouldn't be lying, all the time like this.

OOOH boy, How do I approach this without her coming over and without me making contact??? Boy the tone of her voice is so much different when she needs something. HUH???

That's all I got for ya in the crazy mlc world I live in.

I guess dark = no drama.

Man I had to bust the edit button and jump back in. She is persistant, she called a again and left message on my cell saying the same thing. Then she said "I'm getting the feeling you are starting to avoid me." WOW Did she say feeling??

I'm sorry this is a little wrong, but man, if I don't laugh I'm sure I'll be boo hooing soon.

I'll take the laughs any day.

Ahhhhh, so THAT'S how you go dark!

Not sure you can do it without her coming over, unless you dropped it off at her work one day before she got there. But that would be way too much effort, right? I don't really know your living sitch, but couldn't you just leave it in the mailbox for her with a note inside the screen door that she could read from the outside directing her to the same? Or would that technically be considered contact?

No thats a great idea dude. It might piss her off a tad but that sounds good. I may just leave her a message late tonight. She goes to bed pretty early and just tell her its in the mail box.

Hey T

I have just been going dark myself I at least feel better because I feel more in control. Hang in there and thanks for the support!!

Jeff

Just remember dark is for you. Not to get back at them.

Sometimes they do respond out of curiosity. But it is for you.

Just like coming to post here. it's for you.

If they wake up and see the changes. BONUS!!

I may sound a bit sarcastic when I say I'm doing this.

T

I hear ya, going dark is for me it's good not to deal with the BS sometimes and just go about daily business not thinking about W

Jeff

YES,

Leave THE CIRCUS behind for a while. But:

Get ourselves centered, Take care of us, pray A LOT, focus on us, and read up, study up, know when to shut up, we must look in the mirror ask ourselves what do we need to do to be better?

LET THEM GO!

Stop asking how long its going to last. Stop trying to figure this crazy @$$ stuff out. I pray I never know how much pain their in. To check out and not know why, it must be horrible.

Our we planning on staying stagnant for the rest of our lives, or becoming stagnant after going through hell and back to hopefully save ourselves and our M? FOREVER IS THE ANSWER. That is how long its going to last.

Keep changing for the better FOREVER.

Like it or not, something was missing from our R's. All of our R's guys. What is it? We better start asking ourselves this.

Granted, I believe the stage was set long ago for our wives to make this journey, However, like it or not if we our going to see this to the end. (NOT if and when are w's return, the end is when your room temperature.) WE need to make this journey as well.

It does not stop until your heart stops beating. Change for the better and never stop. We can't....I'm not going back to the same old take my W or life in general for granted s#%t. I refuse! We must continue to grow.

We dropped the ball or miss the boat on something or somethings as well. Figure it out. This is not about coming here everyday and sharing our F'd up crazy W stories. Yes we need to come here and vent, laugh, cry, share are crazy tales, but in the end we have to learn and take action.


It does us absolutely no good to just show up here day after day and bitch about the insanity.

LET GO OF THE ILLUSION. We will never truly have anyone but ourselves. We don't own or control anyone but us, we never have and never will.

Lack of faith, impatience, and fear are my three main reasons for backsliding.

This has opened my eyes to God in ways I could never imagine.

Eight months ago if you told me I would be where I am today. I would have told you your nuts. BUT I'M STILL STANDING.

My wife has left and filed. What I thought was my biggest fear has already happened.

Someone is watching from a perspective that is beyond my comprehension, Who am I to question this? Someone who knows me better than I. Time to follow his lead.

You're learning fast... when you really get it, it just falls into place and you can act from a place of peace instead of panic.

Just re-read what you wrote above each time you start to look behind to see if she's following you.

Then look up.

Hey!

Thank you so much for dropping in. Yes, I wrote it down and put it in my wallet. If the thought of looking back pops in my head I plan on pulling it out.

It's great hearing from you. I'll drop you a line soon.

If you catch me looking back. Smack me upside the head.