Ya I guess we are human! Its is hard to be positive because we are going through splitting up stuff I almost can't wait to be in my own place so that I don't have to see her come and go. She is staying at a friends place tonight I hope it is not OM. Oh well I guess I can only control myself. Going Skydiving tomorrow that should relieve some tension.
Keep the Faith
Jeff
ME 44 W 32 M 5 T 6
no kids
June 08 I don't want to be married it's not you it's me
Can't talk now, had some great jumps!!! And yes as you guessed I pulled the cord. It is always good to get an air bath!!!! Off to my buddies for some steaks and a couple of beers. Will catch with you when I get back. BSC you out there? hope all is well!
Blue skies Jeff
If you get the chance to do even a tandem jump you won't regret it I took my father when he turned 70 he said it was the ride of his life.
ME 44 W 32 M 5 T 6
no kids
June 08 I don't want to be married it's not you it's me
Sorry I haven't been on lately i have been away for work. I don't have time now but will post an update later. Briefly just saw a lawyer and am dealing with the separation stuff. I am loosing steam though.
ME 44 W 32 M 5 T 6
no kids
June 08 I don't want to be married it's not you it's me
My W and I are going through stuff to get a legal separation. I am getting used to it but it sucks!!! She said she would help me decorate my new place (ya right) I feel she is being nice just to hurry things up! I am trying to be civil but it is hard to be upbeat. she says she has no guilt but recognizes I suffered and will miss my friendship. I guess like eveyone else I have no Idea who she is anymore. I am getting pretty lonely. I have my friends and family but I miss just being with her, I miss the simple things.
ME 44 W 32 M 5 T 6
no kids
June 08 I don't want to be married it's not you it's me
I am trying to be civil but it is hard to be upbeat. she says she has no guilt but recognizes I suffered and will miss my friendship.
Jeff, Yes this sucks, As hard as it is you can let her see you down. Show her stregnth. You can do this.
She is being nice right now because she thinks this is her road to happiness. She will see in time that it is just another dead end. Hang in there. It is very lonely, but you will get through this.
My wife offered to her advice as to how to arrange our living room after she took half the crap in it. I wish I had the cash I would redecorate the entire house the way I would like it.
Thanks, Just went to the lawyer today and we agreed on everything, she is going to get the house and buy me out. Things went smooth.
But....... I have been thinking I love my house and my neighborhood I am friends with half the people on my street. I have put a tonne of work into the house. It's perfect for visits from my family because it backs onto the park! I now regret agreeing to letting her buy me out. I didn't want to be house poor. Untill now no one on my street new the sitch although they guessed because when I went to work she would pull up with her older "friend" into our drive way. Now they know, I have huge support and they want me to stay, offering any help they can!! That is hard to find any where! I think I couldn't see through my emotions! I won't have alot of money but would be happy hanging out at my house with my friends and family. I also love working on my house!! I am going to talk to the bank in the morning to see if I can afford it. I only hope if I can she will let me have it. I know that she really can't afford to run it and has no Idea how to fix anything.
I feel now why should I start over when it wasn't what I wanted she has always wanted to move anyway. I think this would be GAL for me!!!! but I don't want it to be messy!
That's my rant for the night, just came back from a hockey game The Toronto Maple Leafs got beat by Atlanta ouch!!!
Jeff Out!
ME 44 W 32 M 5 T 6
no kids
June 08 I don't want to be married it's not you it's me
I understand how you feel about the house. I have done a ton of work on mine too. Man, You got to slow down a bit and think before you make major agreements with her.
Now that you have agreed to give her the house your going to have to be very careful on how you approach this. DO NOT let this turn into a fight, you will fuel her fire. Most MLC'ers are "renters" if you will. They do not want the burdens of up keep on a home. That should work in your favor a bit. Please slow down and think about a good way to deal with this. Do not feed her justifications.
Is your agreement in writing? Is it a done deal?
Originally Posted By: Jeff3
Now they know, I have huge support and they want me to stay, offering any help they can!! That is hard to find any where! I think I couldn't see through my emotions!
Jeff! If your neighbors can see through you your wife can read you like a childrens book. You have got to be STRONG. You have to get this in check, like yesterday man. I'm not dogging you just telling like it is.
DO NOT DISCUSS THIS WITH YOUR NEIGHBORS. DO NOT LET THEM SEE YOUR EMOTIONS EITHER.
Remember the two reasons why your here.
1. To become a better person PERMANENTLY. FOR YOU.
2. To possibly save your marriage.
How will your wife feel if the whole neighborhood knows your business? Chances are she may never want to come back to you, let alone be comfortable being seen by them.
Remember she is sick right now. The OM is her drug.
