frank, I seriously doubt that she doesn't love you anymore. Love doesn't just die. This is part of an epidemic that has clutched everyone called selfishness. People are all worrying about how they can achieve happiness. Happiness isn't found in the arms of another lover but in embracing their family and working through the challenges in life.
Even if your wife won't admit it, I am sure she loves you but doesn't know how to deal with everything. Every where you turn whether it be TV, so called self help books or even so called friends, will tell you that you aren't happy and if you aren't you need to change something in order to find it. Happy is not a place or person, it is realizing and appreciating the people you already have in your life. People keep focusing on the negative and it gets to be their end all and the only way to get rid of it is to escape.
The head over heels feeling that people seek is infatuation, not love. My W wanted that feeling again. She has love. She has admitted, around a year after she left, that she still loves me. Apparently she isn't infatuated with me.
I don't know why. I think I would be, lol ;-)
Seriously, your wife is dealing with issues that probably has little do with you and is about her trying to find her self which so much out there including Oprah telling people they are not anyone if they aren't independent and self fulfilled. BS!!!
What I read above shows me your wife is hurting inside as much as you are. The difference is she is hurting everyone, including herself.
Frank, you are an incredible person. She probably already knows that. You need to know that too.
Me:56, W:51 D:26,S:24,S:22 Married:18 Bomb 9/27/06 Separated 11/27/06 Divorced 10/6/08 Leaving it up to God
Thanks MMF, she seems so distant and I think she is hurting because she is alienating the girls. They aren't depressed without her, she just thinks they are. They really love her and are just being teenagers.
anyway, there's nothing I can do about her, this is her journey.
They aren't depressed without her, she just thinks they are.
Projection? She is feeling depressed without them?
~~**HAPPY BIRTHDAY**~~ Nutty x
Be The Greener Grass.
Me 40 H 42 Son 11 Married 15 years. Left May 2006 after gambling spree I had EA August 2006 OW Aug 07 after another gambling spree (she will make me happy - stop me gambling!) I filed for divorce 9th April 2008.
Got up this morning after W had taken the girls to school. There on the counter was a nice hand written card from the girls wishing me a happy birthday.
They had also taken the present Spitfire had sent me, a small picture frame that says "Friends are the family you choose yourself", and the Snoopy themed card Spitfire had sent me on the other side of their card. They also put the '5' and '0' candles Spitfire had sent me in front of their card.
I went into my office and there on my desk was a card that said 'For Frank' on it. It was from W. It was a Tinkerbell cover saying "Seek Every Dream, And wish on a star". Inside it said "Believe in the magic of all that you are... Happy Birthday".
It played the Peter Pan "you can fly!" song when you open it.
She wrote: You made it to 50! May all the best come your way
No signature.
at precisely 9 am she called me to tell me that the refrigerator was leaking water this morning and she cleaned it up. I thanks her for letting me know and she said to let her know what it costs to get it fixed so she could help out.
Then I thanked her for the card, I said it was 'entertaining'.
She said that she knew it was weird but she liked the song. She seemed kind of nervous.
I told her I liked it too and I appreciated the thought. She congratulated me for making it to 50 and hopes I have a good year.
I said "thanks, I will", and then said "bye have a nice day".
Happy B-day Frank. I tried to find a great ASCII cake for you(knew the 'coder' in you might appreciate that), but the DB site screws up all the spacing.
