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It's almost 6pm and not a word. Guess he has more important things to tend to or maybe more important people to be with. Don't feel bad, I did the same thing, nobody tells us guys these things, you assume we know these things, we don't we are dumber than the dog some time.

Bring it up to him very gentle, use I feel statements, John Gray goes over this stuff very well in his book.

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Hi Shiney,

If anybody understands what I'm going through right now, I know it's you.

My H didn't call until after 6pm and it was from the other house where he sat smoking a cigar and listening to the radio. He didn't even tell me what time he was coming home, just said "I guess I'll see you later". Mind you, I'm supposed to figure out if and when I should make dinner.

Needless to say, I was feeling pretty crappy by the time he drove his sorry butt up the drive.

I did manage to hold tight to most of the points on my goal list, most of the time. No small feat here!

Shiney, I believe you are presently taking a med called "Celexa"? I think my H is overdue for some kind of medical intervention. He says he doesn't think he is clinically depressed, but I say, if he's not then he is doing a fine job impersonating someone who is.

Can one get a prescription for Celexa from their GP, or does this require going to a shrink? Getting my H to a psychiatrist has failed repeatedly.

Jeannine

Poe,

Thanks for dropping by my thread and giving me a bit of male perspective.

"nobody tells us guys these things, you assume we know these things"

He knows, he's been told.


I have practiced the "I feel" statements for years now and I really like John Gray's approach to relationships. He makes a lot of sense, doesn't he.


"we are dumber than the dog some time. "

Actually, I find dogs (actually all animals) to be quite intelligent.


Anyway, thanks for the support Poe, it did help.

Jeannine

Jeannine,

Sending you much comfort.

Whenever my Dad has something medical done that involves pain, my mom reminds me to say, "poor thing" to him.

When we do, he smiles and seems to feel better.

My husband on the other hand, just wants to be left alone, whether sick or painful med. And despite my telling him that I'd rather have the 'poor thing' treatment, he continues to assume that I'm more like him and just want to be left alone.

Oddly enough, my mom saying 'poor thing' to me once is all I need...and I feel much better!

So, I'm sending you a comforting, "Poor thing". And a comforting hug.

Hugs.

Jeannine,
I am amazed each time I visit your thread how much you have to deal with, because you are a wonderful tower of strenght when I read your posts elsewhere. I don't post much because I don't have much to add, but I am thinking of you always, and wishing you the best. Sending good thoughts your way

Jeannine...
I just read your recent thread, haven't posted for a week or 2...you are really dealing with a lot and handling it so beautifully. I am going to print your list of issues, goals, etc. It is exactly relevant to my situation and you listed your goals so clearly, concisely, honestly, and so positive. You are helping me while dealing with so much. I need to get back on track with this group. I got good feedback last month, been working on stuff....taking small steps, but have a long ways to go. I will start my own thread soon again. Just want to give you more warm, prayerful thoughts...and tell you how inspirational you are. Take good care of yourself, vent here....and keep yourself moving forward. In my thoughts.
Mooka

PNT, Kelli and Mooka,

Your kind posts wrapped around me like a warm blanket.
I broke down and cried as a matter-of-fact.

PNT - I'm like you, I prefer the "Poor thing" remedy.
Depending on my H's mood, he sometimes wants to be pampered, sometimes wants to be left alone.

Kelli - "I am thinking of you always, and wishing you the best."
I have to bounce these words back to you. I was just over at your thread and read about your latest test of endurance and when I returned here, there you were, offering words of kindness, extending comfort. You are a good friend.

Mooka - Thank you so much for coming to my thread. Your post was most flattering and I hope that I can live up to your perspective of me. Truth be told though, I don't always handle things beautifully. In fact, I get downright down and dirty with anger, fear, frustration, anxiety and sadness. But that's okay, it comes with life.
Let me know when you get your thread up and going.

Jeannine

Hi Jeannine,

How are you feeling today?

I think your H was totally insensitive but I guess that is the place they are coming from.

Last week my H was there, this week he was here for me!

Maybe they flip flop. He did stay with you and did sit down and ask you for details after your first doctors visit if I am remembering correctly. And I wouldn't count too much on my memory of anything right now!

Here is a big hug for you and hope you get some good news with your test results!

Keep strong. You seem to be so strong to me, you are dealing with so much.

{{{{{{{{{Jeannine}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Jeannine --

Just letting you know I'm thinking of you...I'm sorry h is being such a boob right now to you...guess none of us are surprised that he's struggling with handling what's going on for you.

How are you feeling? I know you're having tons of tests...I hope they eventually give you some way to get back into the pink of things.

Any movement on getting together with your local DB'ers? Having been keeping track of that on your "for fun" thread...

Sage

Thanks Pam,

"How are you feeling today?"

Tired and sad. But that's par for the course. I'm alright.

Yes, our H's do seem to flip flop don't they.

You are sounding stronger and stronger.

Jeannine