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Hi MMF !!!

So lovely of you to drop by !

I agree with you that I get the feeling that ow is being selfish, by trying to 'win my family' over for herself. She is doing this for H I'm sure, but she does not realize how much she is hurting me with her efforts at getting in H's good books !

Oh well, I guess, it's how it goes, I don't think any ow thinks of what the wife must be going through.

ow had a scratch on her car window and she said to the girls...'oh no, your dad will be angry at me!' D9 told me this and asked me why her daddy would get angry at such a little thing. I explained to her that ow has crashed a few company cars allready and that H is fed up with it. (which is true by the way.)

I think I was just glad to hear that it's possible that H is sometimes angry with her...maybe weird, but it helps me to stop thinking all is peachy between those two. I have the tendency to think that they are living in cloud nine.

Had a good day today...did some household chores, groceries, visited a friend who was celebrating her birthday, picked the kids up from school at mid day and walked them back with our dog..it was lovely and sunny. We cleaned the rabbit's cage, and I did homework with D9 and D7. Cooked dinner and put the kids to bed.

It was quite a lovely day. Tomorrow my parents will be visiting.

OH YES !!!!!!!

D7 was watching a kid's programme and a guy kissed a girl that wasn't his actual girlfriend. Then D7 came up to me and said 'if ANYONE EVER KISSES my boyfriend I will be very ANGRY at them...'

So I said...'kind of like how mommy is angry at ow?'

Then she said ...' MUCH ANGRIER !!!'

She made me laugh so much! I think my kids sometimes even wonder if I am mad at ow.


Oh well, just wanted to share this with you !

I was smiling as I read the exchange between you and D7. They get it at whatever age that no matter what cheating is wrong. It is a shame that the OW isn't as mature as your daughter in the morals department.

Something that I noticed about the OW trying to win over your family. I think it is more for her and her poor self esteem rather than for your H. I doubt she really considers anyone else in what she is doing.

And I am curious about how the OWs relationship with her own father is? She comes across as childish (in my relatively narrow view of the OW) and needing your Hs acceptance. Her fear of your H finding out about the scratched window is more of a child's concern of the possible wrath from a parental figure.

Hmmmm

Hi Cinders,
Just wanted to say hi and that your kids are wonderful. Have a nice week.

Cinders,

I completely empathise with you over Christmas. For the first time I will also face a dilemma that has not happened previously even though this will be our 4th Christmas w/o H. Now that my S16 lives with H and OW and he rarely comes to see me (unless he wants money) I am not sure who he will want to spend Christmas day with. I have already invited him here but he has not yet given me an answer. Although it has been hard w/o H the last few years facing the possibility of not having S16 here as well is beginning to eat away at me.

Like MMF I too giggled at the comment your D7 made about morality. A couple of years ago when my nephews (on Hs side) were just 3 and 5 I was babysitting whilst their parents went to a wedding. The 3 yr old asked me is S16 was 'the daddy'. I simply replied 'No uncle A is the daddy'. His older brother thought about it for a while and then said 'If uncle A is the daddy why does he have a girlfriend'. W/o becoming very emotional and risking having to explain to very young children, who aren't mine, the intricacies of separation and D I just replied 'that is a very good question N5 but unfortunately it is not one I have the answer to' (I was very tempted to add that he should ask his uncle to get the answer but I restrained myself). So yes it is surprising how quickly children pick up on values.

Well, D7 took it upon herself this evening to ask H on the phone if it's ok that mommy has a man in her life, if he has ow in his life...Of course his answer was 'sure!'

Oh well...

Had a good day, cleaned up, my dad helped me go to the recycling center..glass and paper is gone now !

Did some house chores, lots of cooking and took the kids to their swimming lessons. My mom came along for that, it was fun !

Helped with homework and now I'm beat ! Want to go to bed soon and read my book ....'Love in the time of Cholera' by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. It's a lovestory..

HOw are you guys ??

hey cinders, LOVE your sig!! already not into the depths of winter and i lit my woodstove today, that will get me to my invincible summer.
I am not strong, nor really inspirational, infact, quite stubborn and when called the B word say thank you lol! what I am is a mom, cant control H or the flippen physco exstripper ow, (altho would love to tattle on her myspace that the pic is so old and not her now lol) but I can love my kids EVERY second of every day, and try to live today the best I can, as tomorrow is supposed to be there, but not always.......
stay strong, stay the mom. my oldest D is a cheerleader, and tried to shoot the ow at her homecoming when she showed up lol, kids are pure joy!
thinking of you

Hi Babygirl !

Thanks for coming over ! I loved what you wrote and truly hope life will bring you loads of warmth and great rays of sunshine !

You're a positive person, who will make it !!!! I'm sure !

Take care, I'll be praying for you ! x

Hey, Cinders! Thanks for stopping by my thread. Catching up on yours...

I feel for your D7. She was hoping that daddy would be upset with the notion that you would have a man other than him in your life.

I can't say for sure because I have no direct insight into his mind but even when a person doesn't want someone back in their life (and I doubt that is the case with your H), they still don't like it when someone is able to move on.

IMO, he is trying to get his daughter to accept his decision to be with someone else other than her mommy by acting as if it is okay for you to have someone else in your life.

I hope I am not making you angry but it is yet another sign of a selfish motivation comment.

Cinders, I have followed your situation for nearly two years now and I can say that (IMO, of course), of all people, your H would be devastated if you were dating.