I'm finding that there is a lot more anger and bitterness than I thought existed. There are certain words and word combinations that seem to come out easier. Not that one, but, others. Still, it isn't too much.
I'm a little frustrated, some money I thought that I could get to, I can't get to. That means that I can't get the divorce ball rolling yet. So, I'm in a holding pattern there.
I'm cautiously hopeful about the new job. Though I am hoping to hear something definitive next week, it might take longer.
I'm finding that I seem to have a lot of time on my hands now that I've decided on a direction and I'm not obsessing about things.
(((Julia))) I'm definitely feeling the urge to drag pretty young girls over to the bar for a pint. Are you game? LOLZ
All in all, it's a pretty good place to be compared to where I was a month ago.
Ah, no confrontation. Originally the plan was to confront her and then talk to the lawyer in the hopes that the confrontation would shock her back into rational thought. However, since the last round of text messages from her phone shows her getting into a deeper relationship with OM1 and cleaning her things out from OM2, I don't figure that there is much chance of any shock changing her direction and I frankly am uninterested in being with this person at all.
Thus, the plan transformed into talk to the lawyer and get everything in order and the filing prepared and then confront the wife, followed by a visit to the lawyer to file the motion, followed by sturm and drang and all kinds of craziness as her self-image fights hard for something that her sub-conscious doesn't want, custody and responsibility for the kids.
Because of her behavior, everyone including all her family are saying that I should seek out full custody of the children and frankly as far as I'm concerned if I've got the kids, I should keep all the money. Were I to get that, she would need to get a different job than the one she has. She would have to move back into the retail world and still might have to beg OM1 to let her move in. My one friend suggested that I just go get the black hat now, because I'm going to be the bad guy in her mind for the next while.
It's been hard a few times especially when she is asking for a favor to tell her off and to get her boys to help her out, but, until the confrontation, I'm playing it cool.
What? You're dragging the pretty young girls to the bar? OK, I'm not as young as Julia, but I could use a drink too!
You're sounding strong. How are you feeling?
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
Things are so calm and placid and drama free that it sometimes almost feels like that things are good. I almost have to remind myself of the bad things just to remember to move forward.
I just want some resolution and to move in a direction instead of standing around the watering hole waiting for something to happen.
Is that weird, or do most people go through times of no drama.
My drama free times are usually when there is no contact. Sometimes those moments hurt me. When there's drama, there's still feelings. Like we care enough to heat things up. Of course, during those times, I also crave peace. I've decided that when I get my own place, the first thing I'll do is paint my bathroom red (h wouldn't allow it), my front door red (another thing I always wanted), and get a sign for my living room or dining room that simply says "peace". A reminder.
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
LOLZ