Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis What will the future bring? - Divorce? III

T for what it's worth I think your H is in the withdrawal phase. Keep letting him spin you can't help him even if you wanted to.

Hi ACJ,
We were just cross posting - how funny. I was posting on your thread.

I wish H were in the acceptance phase!! I don't try to help him anymore.

A friend of mine told me that she also suffered from depression when she had the menapause. She confirmed that she did not want to listen to family or friends that she should seek help. Only she finally seeked help and accepted it from a complete stranger, i.e. a psychologist.

Have you read 'The irritable male syndrome' maybe your H is indeed going through and andropause

ACJ,
Yes, I read it. It describes him to a T!!! He is going through an adropause for sure. I wanted him to read it once he was here and left the book lying about, but he just ignored it. I might re-read the book again.

You know, somehow I am also expecting D papers from H again, although he recently wrote that he can't deal with it right now. He resents me so much for still wanting some money off him that he will surely use that excuse for the D.

Oh well, I am getting quite fed up with all these books. I want to do something else in my life again. During the last 3 years my sitch absorbed me and I read or watched nothing else but subjects on MLC, depression and marital problems.

Hi True,

I read the book Men in MLC & it fit my H to a T also!!! My H didn't realize he was in MLC, I'm not sure he knows it now.

I think you are doing fine & GAL & not responding to him. If he can't deal with D right now then that could mean he is still not ready himself.

My H rushed the D & I truely believe if he had not rushed (I think OW persuaded him) that he would not have gone thru with it.

You keep hanging in there, you are doing great!!!

(((HUGS))))

How about a trip overseas to take the mind off of everything.

Maybe we can go on a cruise:

The Left Behind Spouses Cruise Ship............

Holly can teach us all how to pole dance. ha ha!!

Hey MWG,

Cruise, I like that ideal, the LBS Club!

Hi nlt,
Thanks for your encouraging words.

I don't think H not being able to deal with D right now means he is not ready himself. I think it is more likely that he is travelling or doing some other things which need his full attention, and therefore he has no time to file. I think he made up his mind to definitely get D when I stayed with him.

I had a lovely evening again. I met a GF and we went to a concert which we both enjoyed very much. Tomorrow I will meet her again in the afternoon, and in the evening I will go to a book introduction with another GF.

The weather is quite unpleasant and cold and unfortunately, the fog does not lift all day. So I am glad that I have some events to go to.

Hi MWG,
I would love to go on a cruise to a nice and warm place to escape winter!

True,

You should come & visit here, it's been in the 70's all week & the sun is so pretty. I think it is supposed to warm up later on this week. This is unusual for this time of year here, but I'm enjoying it.

I'm so glad you are getting out & enjoying your life.

I think you should just wait & let H contact you. If he wants the D bad enough he will do something about it.

((((HUGS))))