I silently agree when H says "Oh you want this divorce too" but I always want to add "Yes, you got me to this place."
That's actually remarkable that your H left himself open like that.
My W would never concede such a point - she'd either try to turn it around the other way, saying I forced her into wanting a divorce, or just that I was always really in favor of divorce anyway, and any word I might have said to the contrary was just more of me "being difficult".
I no longer talk to him or write emails. There seems to be nothing to say. I'm always asking myself, "How do I know the difference between the truth or a lie when he's talking?" It's especially difficult when talking (or not talking) about finances.
Wish I had some. Also, my H never listens to me anyway, so I don't bother with talking either.
Journaling...
Last appt with atty today. I will be receiving no child support. This was a blow. In fact, I owe H over $600/month in child support, but he declined it. Also, he offered to put in that he would pay me an amount anyway, but the lawyer said the judge wouldn't sign off on it, since H is already being so 'generous'.
I am scared. I will make it, but I am scared. And angry. My anger is general though, because H had no part in today's verdict, its based our on salaries (mine is over double of H's) and a table.
Lwb, I am so sorry. It's just not fair, especially with you being the primary caregiver.
If it's any consolation, which it never really can be, you can now sympathize with me even on that score, sad-to-say. W is going to take half of my take-home pay now under the pretense of what's "best" for our children. All due to government calculated tables and formulae. You've gotta' love the "State" and it's thinly veiled attempt at income redistribution.
No, I shouldn't sound so flippant. It is scary. I am really wondering now how either of my kids' parents are going to make it, especially me.
But hang in there, lady. I have no doubt you'll make it just fine. You have a great head on your shoulders and the strength of character to not only survive but to thrive.
nocode, thanks. I am losing a chunk of the house AND my retirement as well. H is walking away with a lot of cash but he thinks I am high on the hill with the house and my car. Um, I am not 'getting' a house, I am taking a loan over.
And yes, I don't know how either one of us will make it comfortably. I don't want to see H suffer either.
