Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy trying to be patient and strong (2 or 3?)

I'm fine, karen. THanks for asking. I'm just going to stick to my own thread for a while.

I don't think there is anything you can do to stop your H from bringing OW around the kids, (legally that is).

I'm just checking in on you, I hope you have a great weekend
and I'm keeping you in my prayers.


Just keep swimming, just keep swimming

M45
W41
M10.75 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
W files for D 07/18/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never

Thanks Jeff! Had a busy night tonight--took D8 to art class then did the political meeting--it was mostly boring and disorganized but I guess it's my civic duty to help out (I'm telling myself). On the way to that meeting, I ran into some of my theatre friends, they were working on the set for the current play, and they asked me to help out also, so I'll help out with the play (Singing in the Rain) and sets and all. So tomorrow I'm doing morning political stuff and afternoon theatre stuff. And at some point, I need to actually paint my kitchen! But doing a lot of GALing is really good for me I think. Karen

You could always have a paint my kitchen party with your theater friends. After you could have a cookout or put your new stove to good use!

kat

Wow Karen, you are a very busy person. You are doing a great job GAL. Something I know I need to do a better job at for myself. I was nominated for the finance committee at my parish that is something at least> I need to get more involved like you

You sound like a wonderful person, bright, involved, loving mother and on and on, - Good for you Karen - God bless you

M45
W41
M10.75 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
W files for D 07/18/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never

Thanks Jeff! Yes, I've upped my GAling b/c Puppy & H4H had realized I was not GALing enough, and they were right. I was hiding out from H but not really GALing as much. So now I'm exhausted!!! I painted most of the day, but did clean 2 hours and worked out for an hour. I managed to miss seeing H yesterday b/c I was at that meeting, and then tonight I was upstairs working out when he got here. But I wasn't hiding out from H (have stopped doing that), but just busy GALing.

I had so much fun today with my theatre friends painting! Very fun. I would love to ask them to help paint and I'm sure some would, Kat, but we were saying today how we enjoy painting sets but hate painting our houses! Plus, all of them work full-time and then spend 20 hours or more a week during play season so these are really busy people! I should have done that this summer when they have the 2 months off from plays!!!!

Ok, the good news is everyone said how much better I looked today--I think they mean I'm doing better and positive and everything. We were talking about how during the last play I would come and cry almost every time!!! But most of them have been divorced and are luckily very understanding.

The thing that bugged me is one of my friends there was saying how old-fashioned and naive I am, but a really nice person, and that bothered me a little b/c I'm thinking naive is the code word meaning dumb, and I'm not really. Maybe a little overly trusting or something. Is that something you think I should work on? I mean I've been working on boundaries and don't let H push me around much anymore. Plus, how do you become more modern and less naive anyway?????

Something that struck me funny, although nice of H, is he took the kids to his church tonight and apparently they started a new series for the kids and it has a CD he bought and cards that you go over each day at home that he left for us: on get this: VIRTUES!!!! It talks about how most parents want to raise their children with good character and values. OMG, is that just too funny? Karen

Don't believe anyone that says something like that. You are fine. One of my friends constantly says "Wow, you are stronger than me, I could NEVER let my H do ___ if we were going through a divorce". I finally spoke up and told her it felt like code for me having no backbone.

Yay for GAL! Hey, since you love painting so much, combine GAL, buy a ticket to StL and come paint with me.

Id she is coming to St Louis, she'll need to come to Topeka too! Painting is not my favorite thing and I have some walls that need to be repainted or touched up! lol

Karen, we love you just as you are. Don't change unless it is something you want to change for you.

kat

Please don't change a thing, babe. If it comes to a choice between being naive and innocent even if it means appearing "dumb" -- versus jaded, worldly and cynical -- I would rather err on the former end of the spectrum, frankly. (I think we've all had enough of the latter.)

Hi Karen, I know what you mean about the whole virtue and morals (if I can add that) thing, my H is constantly slamming current sitches (ie: John Edwards) for cheating on their families but he has done the same thing! I worry that my kid's are going to have completely warped morals. . . He also wants me to move out and he get sole custody of the kids * > * ? ! WTF . . He travels all the time . . .
Anyway, I know the feeling, bad news for me he won't move out.