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(((((((Lola)))))))))

Sorry your still feeling bad about your interactions with Rose. I know it feels awful to let a friend down but it's her problem now. You already apologized. If you go with her now is it too late? Was she wanting you to join her church or just wanting to you experience their fellowship? If it's just the fellowship she was hoping you would enjoy then what about a weeknight bible study at her church?


T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43
bomb12/4/07
PA5/07
S12/26/07
D final 11/17/08
Back together with no defined R 05/2010
confused....to say the least!!!

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I think she just thought it was something she wanted to share. I can understand that, and I would really like to go. I am upset because I hate for people to be angry with me, and because I felt it was blown way out of proportion. Either way, it is from her perspective, and I know she is not really angry anymore, but I am hurt that she did not at least acknowledge. I don't like that. I suspect it has to do w/ the experiences from H when he does not acknowledge, which incidentally does not seem to happen lately, but don't really relish the thought of dealing with it again from anyone.

Anyway, H is stopping by this afternoon really quick...called me at lunch. I ran to check on D12 who is not feeling well, so I was not here, and he said he would drop of $10 this afternoon.

I feel a little better. Now if I can get rid of the long weekend lag and get to work!!!


Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..

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Quote:
He said he would drop of $10 this afternoon.

Lola I see that as yet another baby step! He wants to see you...ok yeah sure he's going to drop off 10 bucks but it's a great chance to see you quickly. \:\) Enjoy.

I am still shocked he offerred to pay for your help. DAM!! Maybe next time he offers to pay you can say something like "well, you can take me out to lunch sometime".

As for you BFF I don't know what to say just hang in there and let her be for a bit. You've already apologized so what else is there to say?

Last edited by JenInVen; 09/02/08 07:41 PM.

Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*

The end of the DB road
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Lola, Don't let these things get you down. You and your friend will work things out, You are seeing baby steps with your H, and your XH...Well he will likely still act like an ass but if you "know" this you can be prepaired.

I have down days too...inevitably when I start thinking of things that could be "worse" than my sitch. So, all is not lost try to keep moving forward.

And here's a hug.

(((LolaL)))


Me:34 W:31 d's 5 & 10 M: 5 years, T: 8, Bomb1 3/8/08,#2:3/28/08 Asked 4 D:4/19/08, discovered PA 5/8/08,W moved out 6/30/08 W pregnant by OM: 2/17/08

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(((Jen))) (((Hopeful))) Thanks. BFF and I are texting, so it seems things are smoothing over. I think honestly my reaction is more residual from the M, the fear of losing someone else. She has been the only person from RL that I can just vent too, and she knows she can do that with me too. It will be okay.

The nice thing w/ H stopping by is I am no longer nervous when he does. I think the first few times I wasn't sure how to act, but now it is becoming more natural to chat for a minute, and I like that. The friendship part of our R is something I have really missed.


Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..

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I think that BFF Rs are much easier to smooth over that male/female Rs. I'm sure you guys willbe back to normal before long. I guess you need to go to her church ASAP!

Is H coming to your office or home to drop off the loan?


Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*

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Office. He just left. Talked to him for just a minute, he was on his way back to his office, but he gave me a hug immediately when he got out of the truck (it was nice \:\) ). Saw him laugh and look happy in a way that I have not seen in a while...it was great. Told me he would talk to me later, but he had an appointment at 6:30.


Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..

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Hi...sounds awesome! More positives...a hug, laughter, he looked happy, said he'd talk to you later and gave a very valid reason for running off. Could he be seeing the old/new you? I hope you're smiling now (((((Lola)))))!!


Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*

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I am smiling...five minutes of happy is so much better than an hour of angry! We have had great interaction the past several weeks and I am please with the progression. Most of all, I missed seeing that smile, the one that lights up his face and eyes, and I have not seen it in more than a year!


Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..

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(((Lola)))

That's so great! I'm smiling with you.


M- May 2006
D - Aug 2010
Now travelling the world
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