Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy New Abbreviation for everyone VIII

My H is a big liar also. Every couple years or so I would find out some big lie he told me. I should have probably left him and given up on the marriage long ago, or seen an MC about that or done something. I just let him get away with it over and over though which now I realize was so wrong of me. I don't understand why people would lie like that though?? Actually, maybe she just needs help, IC or something. Sorry you're going through that--finding out stuff but maybe it's good too?

Karen; Thanks sweetheart for checking in on me and posting your thoughts.

I went through my marriage with blinders on, always looking for the best in W, overlooking her faults, which is a double edge sword, your trying to look for the good but not addressing the evil. When I did address the problems, I got nowhere, so over time I guess I stop trying.

I don't think its your fault or mine, we were willing to try. We were not the ones lying, we were always looking for the good in our S. Now they have pushed us to a point where there is only one option for us, really no option, but to move on with our lives without them and keep being the best we can for ourselves, for our kids.

We have no control over them, its not our choice. There has to be some good people out there for us, I hope we find them. I pray to God, that he/she will bring true love into my life again. Its going to have to be a very good woman to want me and 4 kids.

Thanks again Karen, Its late, sweetdreams,

M45
W41
M10.75 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
W files for D 07/18/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never

Sad that she didn't have any confidence in herself then or now. I am really sorry that this has been so hard for you. If you weren't 5 hours a way I would be giving you a big hug and her a smack upside the head saying "Snap out of it"!

kat

I just know there are!!! I've met good people here, in church, just not in our marriages right? I don't think it will be hard for you at all--the kind of person you want to marry will love you and your 4 kids and they'll see that as a positive I think--more love to go around right??? I'm going to go pass out now too--I'm exhausted and we're going to run with the dog tomorrow morning! Sweet dreams Jeff and Kat! Karen

Oh, me too!!! (Well 2 days away in my case) but yeah, that would be so much fun!!!! Good night, Kat!

Hi Jeff! I wanted to let you know that I moved to the Surviving board. But I will still check up on you because I am always thinking and praying for you.

Going away this weekend to Chicago. See you on Monday.

Sara

The guy the hit my truck last Friday night, doesn't have insurance, he has had a large number of problems drinking and driving, he got a DWI that night, he is 41 and still lives with his mom can everyone say loser.

Front end of my truck is all out of alignment, will end up costing me to get it fixed. W called and got the information from a friend of hers thats on the police force. She started lecturing me about where I should park the truck, I said, I knew you were going to tell me that, I have to go, she said wait, and started crying about all the stuff that has happened to us over this year, everything breaking down around the house, etc, etc.....

I told her I'll take care of everything, she doesn't need to worry, she said she doesn't want bad thing to happen to me (still crying), I said not one good thing has happened to me this year, that I can't let it get me down, I have to keep moving forward with my life. She was still sobbing and I told her I had to get going, so we said goodbye.

I'm not letting all of this get to me, yes I still think of W everyday. It will take some time to get her out of my head. I'm moving forward; every time I get knocked down I get right back up.

I feel like Dory from "Finding Nemo" Just Keep Swimming Just Keep Swimming

Hey Mr Grump Gills
You know what you gotta do when life gets you down?
Just keep swimming
Just keep swimming
Just keep swimming swimming swimming
What do we do we swim, swim, swim
OH HO HO How I love to swim

I hope 2009 is a better year for me

M45
W41
M10.75 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
W files for D 07/18/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never

I read your whole thread again. I can see where you are confused about what to do. Don't give up on reconciliation, Jeff. You shouldn't stay in a marriage JUST for the kids, but you love her and you could have a happy life with her. It IS in her hands, but you never know what changes could occur. It would be VERY hard work for both of you, but you could both have the happy, family life that you both want.

It's unbelievable about the lies. She is so broken, Jeff.

I'm sorry about your truck, too. Her talk about how she doesn't want bad things happening to you....she is feeling sooo guilty right now. She realizes how selfish she is and it hurts.

hey whatdidido thanks for checking in on me

It is in her hands, her actions over the years tell me to let her go, she has hurt me for the last time. Yes I do love her always did always will, but she is like an animal in a cage, wants to run, so I'm going to set her free.

I'm tired of trying, I don't want to wait for her, I don't want to hope anymore. I don't want to think of her in OM arms, I want the pain to end and move on with my life.

Just keep swimming, just keep swimming

M45
W41
M10.75 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
W files for D 07/18/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never

(((((( Jeff))))))))) OK.

Only you know what is the right thing to do.