So nothing to much to post...He never brought me the medicine but he sent this text yesterday "Hi. I'm sorry i couldn't get those pills to you but I've been closing and haven't left until 12 or later. I open tomorrow I can give them to you." I just replied, "Cool, thanks, I figured they must have you busy with back to school coming up". Then he just asked if I was still feeling sick.
I know that this is still good since he could not have wrote period and he even apologized and gave an explanation, which is actually a 180 for him. I just am soo impatient and want MORE!! LoL I know...I know, baby steps....
Your right, that is good!!! Now, step back, breath, and go with the flow. No pushing...
My H did the same thing for me one time when I was sick, went out of his way to scold me for not calling him sooner, brought me Theraflu and then brought me more Theraflu the next day. It was sweet.
You did great with the validation about being busy. Remember, it takes more than once. But you are doing really fabulous!!!!
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
No pushing...no texts or anything here. I know I have to keep that up, I'm sure he was surprised that I said I figured he was busy instead of accusing him of hanging with his friends or saying something sarcastic like I would have in the past.
Oh I get that last post so well! I too have a tendancy to be very sarcastic to XH about his plans. You did so well by validating rather than accusing. I bet he's wondering WTF!
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
Alright so I am so confused right now. Was just sitting here reading trying to catch up on what's happened today and I get text from H "Are you home?", so I say yes and go into the kitchen to throw something out and see his car turn down my block. Then 2 seconds later he calls the house "I will be up in a minute I have your medicine."
Now he knows that I am not sick anymore but he brought them anyway...any who he came up gave me the medicine, apologized for using most of it and took his mail. He then headed back towards the door then just asked if that was all his mail. I said yes, but then he stopped and asked about the part time job and I told him that I start next week. Then he asked about another job interview that I had a few weeks back...mostly small talk that lasted another 2 minutes ..then he left.
I don't know I mean is this a good thing that he came by period? I feel so confused right now.
Hi! Yes it's a good thing! As I was told before on my thread "X minutes is better than nothing". He wanted to see you. Next time you might want to offer him something to drink. This may be good for your sitch because he's Latino. Latino men like to feel taken care of as long as they don't feel smoothered.
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
Very true Jen...thanks now I am smiling I guess he could of called and said come down to the car and get it or not even brought it at all since I really don't need it anymore.
One of my 180s is actually trying not to take care of him anymore...that was one of my problem before I took care of him so much that he felt I was controlling him...Grrrrrr
he'll find the need to keep the attachment and drippoing in fills that need.
But remember there needs to be a balance between too much/over care which makes them feel smoothered and basic kindness such as "can I get you a nice cold beer?"
See?
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
I feel so confused right now.
I guess he could of called and said come down to the car and get it or not even brought it at all since I really don't need it anymore.