I have to admit that the second bomb (brought on by my pressure for things to change) hurts alot less....I will be fine. Again I feel like I am repeating myself but the D7 aspect is what I am concentrating on. I / we are no longer the issue. I guess when you say recidivism you refer to the 2nd. bomb....unless you are intimating that OM (which i never reeally confirmed because of the no snooping rule) is back in your opinion. This will sound weird but I get the feeling that W will want the m back in the future.....I am not going to wait for it but....just a feeling i have.....we will see.
It seems to me that apart from this site everyone else wants us LBS to really move on. Otherwise they think we are living in a fantasy world. And moving on with an "ultimate goal" of restoring the M is incomprehensible at best. If you don't mind I have some questions.
Originally Posted By: gForce
For me, I wasn't able to do that until the "last straw" made me feel like I had enough and was no longer trying to salvage my M.
What was that?
Originally Posted By: gForce
When W wanted to come back, the real decision was whether I wanted her back, and whether to reverse some of the plans I had made to move on.
The "last straw"? We put off our D at the last minute for the first time in June. Immediately after that, W didn't respons to any of my attempts to talk/phone/email. I then found out that she spent the next weekend away with OM. When she finally did talk to me, it was to tell me that putting off the D was a mistake and we should reschedule a court date asap. I was crushed, and any residual desire to keep fighting was gone.
What had I done to move on? I accepted a new job out of state, put an offer on a new house there, and if I hadn't gotten my M back, I would have moved this week. So when I say "move on", I mean more than just emotionally ready to move on -- I mean it literally!
Me45 W35 M6 T8 D16 SD11 D0 Dec 07: Bomb July 08: Busted! Thread
I'll keep my eyes open for movie night. Hopefully lodo will pick a good one.
Not much happening worth reporting. Getting into more of a routine, which is nice. I am so glad to be done with the daily drama. All the best to you all. I'm still lurking around.
Me45 W35 M6 T8 D16 SD11 D0 Dec 07: Bomb July 08: Busted! Thread
So the movie is "Dan in Real Life" but I don't know for when. I am guessing next week. I am thinking I will just have to have set days and then everyone will know that wants to join in. However, I still like being flexible and being able to say this Friday if I want to.
Still stretching my wings.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
smw, thanks. I'm hoping you had a good evening last night. kat, I'll keep an eye out for the date and time.
Funny how quickly you get used to things and start taking them for granted. W, SD, and I were hanging out last night on the couch watching TV. Nothing special, I thought, but then I suddenly realized how incredible even this simple scene was, given the turbulence this year. W looked so beautiful and I just felt so lucky how things have ended up and to have my family back.
XOM wrote W a note saying that he was concerned about her. He implied maybe she was back with me for financial stability and said that he was going to take a life insurance policy and name her as beneficiary so she wouldn't have to worry about anything in case anything happened to him! He did something similar a few months ago when he went out of town for a week, and made a big deal of taking out a travel insurance policy on himself. This is very strange IMHO. Maybe he is planning to commit suicide? W simply told him no thanks, don't bother.
I'm working this weekend, but have the day off tomorrow. Next weekend I'll be going down to NYC to see D14. She has been a little cool towards me since W and I got back together, so I'm hoping for a good get together.
Me45 W35 M6 T8 D16 SD11 D0 Dec 07: Bomb July 08: Busted! Thread
