Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis My Heart is Breaking #7

Hi Everyone, Thank you all so much for checking on me. I'm just really down right now. I worked in the yard this afternoon mowing & I'm tired also.

Dawn: The AD's I'm on are Buderphion XL 300mg, generic for Wellbutrin & the other is Citalopram, generic for Celexa. He also gave me Xanax for panic attacks. I don't take these regular. I haven't been to a psych just to a C but not in a while. I guess after this I'm going to try to find one.

Being me: You didn't offend me at all! Thank you for posting to my thread. No, my xh never did want too much responsibilities he was very upset when I didn't go back to work full time. I guess he didn't want to carry the load, I really didn't have to but he didn't like it. That was one excuse. I know for sure his 1st W ran around on him. I found out thru friends, so I know he was telling me the truth. Your are right about him blaming others, it's never their fault. That is the way his family is. I believe his true problem right now is the MLC, I'm reading the book Men in MLC & it fits him perfect all the way back to 2005. I am so glad I have this website & I can vent here & get everyone's opinion. Believe me I appreciate what you said. I grieve for the man I married, he was my best friend, he is just crazy right now, lost his mind!

Addie: Thank you so much for these stats! You are right, I do find comfort in them. I do appreciate you & everyone else on here thinking & praying for me.

I'm working on trying to move forward but it's so hard. I still just can't imagine my life without him. He is my family & you just don't walk away from family. I don't know how you can turn off love that quick, as much & as crazy as he was about me, I just don't understand.

Thank you all so much for being here for me! Sorry it took me a while to post. I just rested, hugged on my dogs & watched some TV.

(((HUGS)))

NLT sorry you are still feeling so down, but what could one expect with a blow like this.

I relly could not imagine my h getting m againn and how I would be able to handle that. I would be devastated too.

You really need to wait 18 months to 2 years before you jump into another R. Just keep focusing on you and what you need to get over this rough time in your life.

Any plans?

My h is on citalopram too. I think it's helping him a little.

Hi Glamgirl,

I knew someone would be on here to help me! It is hard for me to imagine him married again & so quick!

I'm trying to focus on me right now but there are just so many memories of he & I together. 15 years married & 3 years before that dating, 18 years together I just can't imagine my life without him. I wonder if he ever thinks about us & the life we had together or is he still in la la land.

Everyone is saying, that I've told he got married, I haven't told many but they are saying he has lost his mind! I do believe this woman is a pro, she is like those you see on soaps, I don't watch them anymore but I used to & she sounds just like them.

I had prayed so hard the hedge of thorns prayer over & over I felt good about things & I really thought he would be back.

Oh & by the way, I finally got my kitchen cleaned up, dishes in the dishwasher & washed. It will be nice to be able to find the cabinets & sink in the morning.

You will get over him, but it will take time. I was with my first h for 17 yrs. I did eventually get over him, now I have been with current h for 13 yrs. Wow I see those numbers together and wonder was I ever on my own.

I am the type that I just wanted to get m, have kids and live happily ever after. I know some woman don't necessarily want this path, but me I knew what I wanted my whole life. It just seems that whoever I hook up with doesn't share that same philosophy.

Yeah I really thought my h would be back too, now after 2 years we have positives, but no announcement of honey I want to come home.

Through all the trials of my life I have come to realize that God is and always will be my ROCK!

Good for you, doing better than me. I have dishes in the sink, but I need to clean in the morning. Not motivated later in the day.

Good for you!

I just really wanted to get married, have kids & live happily ever after also! Well that didn't happen. I got started with my career & that went well. I met my H late in life & we got married when we were 32, thought we were both old enough that we had sowed our wild oats! I guess he hadn't. Well, I really think he had but this MLC, me not working, him feeling like he was being used by me. Yeah right! Just wait, I do believe he doesn't know what being used is yet, I feel like this woman will chew him up & spit him out. I could be wrong as I've never met her & do not want to. She is out of his league & he is the one that said that, when he told her this I'm not sure what he meant unless he thought she had money.

It's just really hard, especially when I think & see the cards he gave me & hand wrote in there that he couldn't imagine his life without me & that he would marry me all over again. Crazy!

Well, I haven't been too motivated either. I just finally had to do it! I need to work on the rest of the house now but again, we'll see how I feel tomorrow.

Glam, How did you get over your first H?

This is my first real love. The most I ever dated anyone was about 4 months until I met my H. I didn't date that much & when he came along he was the love of my life.

Well sometimes it just takes meeting someone else to do that. I met my current h and realized that I didn't want to be with a drunk, drug addict, smoker, w abuser, unemployed bum. In the beginning when I was dating my h I thought I was going to get back with my h. Then I realized I deserved so much better and my current h was everything I ever wanted in a man.

He was kind, gentle, loving had a good job, no smoking, no drugs, no drinking, no abuse, wanted children. It was like wow I won the jackpot.

I still believe he is all what he was when I m him, he has just gotten lost along the way to life.

What was missing in both my h's was the love of Christ. I strongly believe without Christ life and m is jsut so much more difficult.

I also was so angry at my first h for dumping me with our s to raise all by myself with no support financial, physical, emotional nothing. I asked God to help me and it was amazing. God took the anger from me almost instantaneously.

God can heal you too NLT!