My thread in infidelity just locked up. And so I am bravely moving over here. I want to cling to the group I have been a part of for awhile, but I know I don't belong there because I am now divorced.
Many of you know my story....here is the rundown again for those of you who don't.
Aug 2006- H is with a prositute and thinks he has AIDS (he didn't). Admits to it, we go to MC and our marriage seems to be really good.
Dec 2007- find strange message from a women on H's cell phone.
Jan 2008- H admits there is OW, he stays out all night, I cry and beg and plead and cry some more. Finally I read DB and come around here.
Feb-March 2008- OW breaks up with H and he comes back home. He is depressed but I think that things might be working out.
April 2008- H's old behaviors come back. It is obvious to me that he is with a woman. I just didn't think it was the same one.
May 19 2008- Worst day of my life. H says he wants to come home. OW comes to my door and basically forces H to say that he is in love with her and wants to leave me. However H refuses to leave our house. Cops are called and he will NOT leave.
June 5 2008- I give H one last chance to come home and I will nt file for D. I see his car at Ow's mom's house.
June 6, 2008- I file
July 1, 2008 - After much arguement, we reach a settlement and papers are signed.
July 2, 2008 - The judge signs off on the papers and we are divorced.
July 16, 2008 - H by court order has to be out of the house (remember he would not leave). H is gone but all of his possessions remain.
Aug 2, 2008 - Divorce is offically offical.
Aug 1-5, 2008 - xH calls me and tells me that he has broke it off with OW. He wants to be friends and we begin a friendship of talking on the phone.
Aug 6, 2008 - xH calls and says I can no longer contact him or be his friend because he is back together with OW. Why does this hurt me?
So there I am....not a happy person. I feel like I divorced so fast that my head is still spinning from it. I am doing a lot of things for myself but just feel empty.
Sara
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
welcome. sorry you are here but you will find lots of support, words of wisdom and a good laugh when you need it.
found out about affair 8/06 H moves out Nov/06 D final 8/07 X re marries OW 5/08 _________________________ Courage does not always roar, sometimes it is a quiet voice at the end of the day saying... " I will try again tomorrow". -- Mary Anne Radmacher
Sara-- It does seem like a whirlwind; so sorry that you are here, but it is a good place to be if you find yourself in our sitch. What are you doing for you, to try to make some of the spinning stop?
I have been doing a lot actually. I am re-decorating the house to make it more "me" and less "us." Just got finished painting the bedroom and it looks like a totally different place.
Just my hair cut and highlighted and it looks nice. Going to Chicago for a Beatles convention this weekend (my total favorite thing of the year!).
I just had no idea that you could get divorced so quickly. Craziness I tell you! Here my uncle has been trying to get divorced for over 2 years now and I sneak up behind him and get it done in 2 months.
Me-31 H-38 M: 5 yrs T: 7 yrs No kids Went to Prostitutes 10-1-06 Found out about OW 12-24-07 Bomb on EA/PA: 1-2-08 OW ended it with H "for good" 3-8-08 OW is back 4-19-08 H and OW tell me that they are in love 5-19-08 Filed for divorce 6-5-08 Divorced 7-2-08
exactly what Donna said. what are you doing for you? manicure? pedicure? night out with friends?
found out about affair 8/06 H moves out Nov/06 D final 8/07 X re marries OW 5/08 _________________________ Courage does not always roar, sometimes it is a quiet voice at the end of the day saying... " I will try again tomorrow". -- Mary Anne Radmacher
Hi Sara, Caught the latest craziness from your X on your last thread. I understand what you are saying about hating the OW, but I have to say - she can't MAKE H do anything, any more than you ever could. Each of us is ultimately responsible for our own actions, regardless of what excuses and rationalizations may get doled out. If you want to be angry with someone, aim that where it really belongs - at the confused and pathetic fool who left you.
Hang in there, you are a terrific person and you're going to get through this! (((Hugs)))
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
