The saying goes that a man needs sex to feel loved whereas a woman needs to feel loved before having sex. Kind of a chicken and egg senario.
I too have had the neglected, bottom of the totem pole feelings before my M fell apart. I would say that physical is a primary LL for me. I just kind of accepted that my W was often too tired, but after the bomb, I realized that if we were to reconcile that this would be something I would want to work on together through counseling.
You deserve to feel loved in your M. I hope you aren't just sticking around for the benefit of D7 as your misery will enevitably rub off on her. The best thing for your daughter is to see both her parents in love with each other. I suspect your W still loves you as you do her. It is just going to take some time and I wonder if the 2 of you have agreed to any sort of counseling or Retro weekends?
BBJ for some reason, when I read more more more....I immediatelly thought of how do you like it? how do you like it? who the heck sang that? K....yes yes....tease her...but don't go any further.... I need specifics on the teasing part even though i know i am a weak man...i will never be able stand it... Teasing suggestions please (from the ladies preferably).
I will be little help here! My husband walking in the room is a tease for me! My husband was always good at giving suggestive looks. Walking out of the bathroom with just a towel around his waist from a shower is always a biggie. A caress, sexual banter. I am easy when it comes to him. SIGH
SMW
M40/H36 T16/M14 4K B2/08 S4/08 current
Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. I Corinthians 13:7
Wow, i don't know about naked houswork...I may scare the dog, cat and D7....not to mention W. I think i will stick with the towel out of the shower and BBJ's suggestions...... Well, I am on the deck right now (I love wireless) smoking a stogie. I don't have to worry about my bad breath since i am being distant for 2 weeks.
John, take her hair off her face (if long), but keep it to that, let her feel your fingertips but NOTHING more,
Tell her she looks beautiful and SEXY and better than she did in years
Wear something you know she likes for no reason and pretend it "just happened" you chose that
Get undressed in front of her but discreetly and let her...admire
Kiss the back of her neck as you walk by when she is doing something and don't stop, just go on walking
Comment on how she smells
Comment how beautiful she looks in the morning
MAKE EYE CONTACT!!!
Concetrate on HER when she talks
"Banter" if she likes it but in situations (away form the house, while with people) that she KNOWS you don't expect anything from her
Tell your D in front of your W, how gorceous she looks just like her mom
IMPORTANT NOTE: All the above should be "executed" in a way that clearly STATES you have no expectations for ML. You "hit and run", you don't linger, look needy, desperate or anything similar.
A woman likes her man happy and strong and confident. Keep that in mind. K
