You definately don't want to be the guy I used to be and I won't be the girl you used to be.
Deal?
I got D's in bed tonight. After singing a Journey medley, of course. They made so much fun of me. They kept trying to run out of the room, but I had them locked in.
Roomie finally got home. We are puting away groceries and D11 comes into kitchen. I am in back fridge. I come back and roomie is talking softly to her
All I hear is, "We need to be strong" . I walk over to D11. She gives me a hug. I am hugging her back. I give a glance to roomie, like what's going on. She has a blank, sad look.
"You okay, baby?" Nodding. I feel roomie looking at us. D11 steps back. She is wrapped in her favorite blanket.
"Things are going to be so different. Why do things have to change?" she whines. I go to give her a hug.
"Sometimes things change. Someday your gonna grow up and go to college and leave. That will be a change" is what roomie says.
That's all she can say? While I'm still hugging her, I lightly tell her,
"We are gonna get through this. We'll be okay. We are going to be so much stronger because of it. Okay. I love you too much."
I take her back to bed. I come back, I continue what I was doing. I am not going to talk right now. I might say something that I really don't want to.
I don't have to. I can see her face. I see her starting to tear up. She is starting to scrub the stove burners.
??????
I finish puting away the groceries. I do something in the bedroom. I come back and roomie asks me,
"Are you hungry? A frozen pizza maybe?" "I had a bowl of cereal earlier. If your hungry, I'll eat something."
I leave and take a shower. I go to kitchen and she is making a mess in the stove with the pizza. She is laughing at herself. Trying to get me to engage with her. I just walk past and grab a beer for myself. I grab two pieces of pizza and go back to my room and put my movie on the computer. She stays in the kitchen.
Did I just leave her there? Thinking? Was she waiting for me to invite her to watch the movie? Dunno. I almost did. I felt like I shouldn't. I hear the tv come on in the living room. I finish the movie, and go to living room. She is out on the sofa with the tv on. I take a pillow out from behind her back, cover her with a blanket and turn off the tv.
We'll see if she goes to church with us. Probably not. I'll get a chance to take the kids to see my parents. If she goes, then we'll do something else. I don't want her to go over. I don't think they WANT her over. At least, not right now.
Like I said, a mess she'll have to clean up herself.
Goodnight all.
----------------------
Well, roomie didn't go to church with us.
Again.
Wonder why she hasn't been going? Hmmmm. I reckon she's just as much afraid of the lightning bolt as I am. The sermon was spot on for her, too.
Taking the Wrong Way. Falling into temptations. David and Bathsheba. Oh, well.
Maybe should just doesn't want people to get the wrong impression anymore. Being at church together.
Who cares.
On the way to church, I realized I left my cell at home charging. What are the odds that she ISN'T going to snoop it?
The call from B yesterday, the calls back and forth and tons of missed calls on Friday from her. About 15 texts back and forth from my other friend D. Nothing that would suggest anything. Lunch stuff, some referral stuff, a bunch that asks to call her or that she needs to get ahold of me. Some look interesting to someone on the outside. There is one about her friend that is inviting her and I out to dinner and drinks for a favor I did for the friend.
Oh well. It will keep her guessing, I guess.
Spent some time at mom and dads after church. They were excited. Of course, mom and my sister have to start in. I get them up to speed on whats going on.
She asks how long I'm going to stay at the house, alone. I stupidly say, "Until they forclose on it." I'm dumb.
I mention that I was trying to figure out if I'll let roomie take the girls beds to the apartment.
"What?! What do you mean? Those are their beds. For the house. Those should stay in their rooms!" "But either way, mom, I don't want them to be without. At the apartment or the house. I was just thinking aloud." "Let her get her own damn sh**!" She catches herself and is quiet. I back off and go get a drink. She goes outside.
That is why I don't spend a lot of time there. But I need to from now on. That is going to be our family time. For the girls. We just hang out. Talk to my sis a little. She is angry, too. They just can't seem to let it go. It's not directed at me. It's roomie.
We spend a few hours there. Head home. Roomie has had no idea where we were. I bet it was bugging the hell out of her. We get home and she has started to gather a few more things to get ready. Stacking stuff by the wall on her side of the bed.
Of what USED to be her side of the bed.
The bathroom is spotless. The bookshelf where she took all her nick nacks. She put a bunch of my stuff up there. Packed more stuff. Some frames. Wedding pics? Our marriage book. It was a wedding gift. A display book. Talks about two souls coming together as one. She had taken it down a while back. Some framed pics of us? Probably for the girls room. Looks like she is going to take all the loose photos, too. I need to bring that up. A hanging plaque from my mother about daughter in laws. It talks about how her son picked the right one and how she is now a daughter?? Photo albums and her books.
She cleaned behind her dresser. The dresser itself is still exactly the same. A bunch of crap on top of it. Vaccumed. Steam cleaned some areas. The stove. Baking stuff. All being cleaned. She is making roast for dinner tomorrow. She had made some homemade potato chips, expecting us home for lunch. She asks if the girls are hungry. She wants to make hoagies. She asks if I want one. I say sure. She makes one for me, too. We sit at table together. Girls are in front of tv watching Hannah Montana concert. I am facing tv. Not a glance to roomie. My peripheral caught a glimpse of her looking at me.
She is acting weird. Guilty concience most likely. She is trying to be nice to me. Not sure why. I'm definatly not trying to engage her in anything. I respond to her, of course. Nicely. And I'm being upbeat. Humming my Journey songs. Wonder if she saw the tickets on my dresser that were conspicuously placed.
I also realized that she really splurged on groceries last night. Lots of name brands. Lots of stuff we don't usually purchase, being on a budget. I saw receipt. $225! For just this week? Not stuff that she plans on taking with her.
She left to take all the stuff that nephews friend had here. I left my bible in her car. It had the bulletin for todays sermon in it and all my notes.
I hope she snoops THAT.
This coming week should be interesting. Friday is move in day. I talked to D's a bit today, too. Told them that I was going to be okay. Not to worry about me. Or mom. We have to accept what is going to happen. We can't change it. I don't want it either, but we will survive and get through it. And be strong for each other. We'll talk every night to catch up and good nights. They'll do the same when they are here at home with roomie.
I'm gonna have to give her a new nickname after Friday.
Suggestions?
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
"We are gonna get through this. We'll be okay. We are going to be so much stronger because of it. Okay. I love you too much."
I take her back to bed. I come back, I continue what I was doing. I am not going to talk right now. I might say something that I really don't want to.
I don't have to. I can see her face. I see her starting to tear up. She is starting to scrub the stove burners.
??????
I finish puting away the groceries. I do something in the bedroom. I come back and roomie asks me,
"Are you hungry? A frozen pizza maybe?" "I had a bowl of cereal earlier. If your hungry, I'll eat something."
I leave and take a shower. I go to kitchen and she is making a mess in the stove with the pizza. She is laughing at herself. Trying to get me to engage with her. I just walk past and grab a beer for myself. I grab two pieces of pizza and go back to my room and put my movie on the computer. She stays in the kitchen.
Did I just leave her there? Thinking? Was she waiting for me to invite her to watch the movie? Dunno. I almost did. I felt like I shouldn't. I hear the tv come on in the living room. I finish the movie, and go to living room. She is out on the sofa with the tv on. I take a pillow out from behind her back, cover her with a blanket and turn off the tv.
I see all the cleaning, cooking, etc. she's doing as a "St. Roomie" routine. My wife did the exact same thing. It used to nauseate me. She's especially do it right after she had been with OM.
I agree with Puppy, you are being very strong, keep it up, I know its hard, but you have no choice.
Same with me puppy, see my post, W doing little things, cleaning bathroom one week, cutting grass, making me dinner. I say nothing, keeping quite doing my own thing while W tries to figure out life.
Keep up the good work H4H, we are all here for you
M45 W41 M10 3/4 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08 Date I'll forgive W for A = never
You definately don't want to be the guy I used to be and I won't be the girl you used to be. Deal! I'm gonna have to give her a new nickname after Friday. Suggestions?
You could refer to her as GBG - Gone Baby Gone? Gimme some time to think on it.
I'm with Puppy. You sound so strong right now, good for you. If she snooped then all the more good for you. Keep up the good work and keep GAL. I'll post more later. BTW...Suga, I like that. Thanks.
Last edited by Sugar and Spice; 07/28/0802:52 AM.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
I'll wait for Suga to gimmee a good one. Me likee Suga, too.
I like the name, too
I do feel strong. I had to reassure my mother and my sister. I have my faith and my strength.
I was on my bed with D6 when she got back home tonight. She had to call me earlier because I forgot to put the dvd back in the cover. Yup, I left it in the computer.
D6 and I were playing around on my bed. Roomie comes in with the little momma dog. D11 had put a metal beret on her ear and it was bothering her. Looked like it hurt, but she wouldn't let roomie take it off. Roomie brings her to the bed and tries to remove it. The dog is NOT liking it. Nearly snapping at roomie. I grab her my the muzzle and hold her while roomie tries to remove it. She is having to hold the dog close to her and my hand is up against her boob.
My last feel up? Too bad she had a bra on
She removes it and dog runs off. Roomie decides to sit on the lounge chair we have by our, ahem, I mean MY bed. D6 and I are watching "The Incredibles". She is watching with us and playing with a puppy now. I tell D6 that I want something sweet. She asks if we have any kettle corn. I say I don't think so. Roomie chimes in, "Do you want me to make the banana nut bread?" She had bought a box of mix yesterday, too. Something else different. I don't really reply to her. I keep messing with D6. Like I didn't hear her. Tickle fighting again. After about 10 minutes, I ask D6 if she wants some banana nut bread. She says ok. Roomie gets up and gives us the puppy. She goes to make the bread. I hear her asking D11 if they want to watch a movie with her. D11 comes to see what I'm doing. I'm here on the computer. She goes back.
A little later, I hear the bread is ready. Roomie is making coffe too. I hear her ask D11, "Go ask you dad if he wants some bread and coffee." D11 comes to ask. I say sure. She runs off. I purposely don't follow her. "Did you ask your dad?" "He said yes." I still sit at my computer. She's not going to bring it to me, is she? I then hear, "Ask your dad if he wants this White chocolate creamer." "Dad, do you want the new creamer mom bought? Chocolate something." I don't answer, I just go to the kitchen. She is going to tire out D11. She was pouring coffee. I went and sliced myself a piece of bread. She had hers already. As I'm slicing, she comes next to me and grabs some forks from the drawer and places one by my plate.
She is walking out of the kitchen and I go to the cupboard to get a coffee cup. "That one on the island is yours." Oh, okay. I grab it and come back to my room. Scarfed it up.
THEN I hear her making room in the living room for them to watch their movie. I again hear roomie ask D11, "Did you ask your dad if he wanted to watch the movie with us?" "He's on the computer." "Oh." I hear roomie telling D6 to get a piece of bread and then, "Juli! That is WAY too big. Go share that with your dad!" "I was gonna share with daddy." D6 comes into room with more that half the bread that was left, on her plate
We share it. I go to kitchen and they have started the movie. Roomie is not on the sofa as usual. She's on the chair. Maybe leaving room on the sofa for me with D6. D11 is on the floor.
I'm gonna head over there and watch it with them. Some stupid dance movie.
Maybe D6 will fall asleep on me. Thats worth a stupid movie.
Okay, I hear "The Humpty Dance" playing over there in the movie.
Gonna go kick it old school.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
The Humpty Dance...I love that song! (((H4H))) nice one copping a feel...way to GAL! LOL!
So are we going with GBG? S2BXR sounds like a droid from Star Wars.
I'm glad you went and watched the movie with them, that was nice of her to include you...hmmmm, is she giving this some thought? Did you ever find out if she snooped? My guess is YES!!!!!
(((H4H))) Suga hugs for you! Have a great night.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
I'll wait for Suga to gimmee a good one. Me likee Suga, too.
I like the name, too
I do feel strong. I had to reassure my mother and my sister. I have my faith and my strength.
I was on my bed with D6 when she got back home tonight. She had to call me earlier because I forgot to put the dvd back in the cover. Yup, I left it in the computer.
D6 and I were playing around on my bed. Roomie comes in with the little momma dog. D11 had put a metal beret on her ear and it was bothering her. Looked like it hurt, but she wouldn't let roomie take it off. Roomie brings her to the bed and tries to remove it. The dog is NOT liking it. Nearly snapping at roomie. I grab her my the muzzle and hold her while roomie tries to remove it. She is having to hold the dog close to her and my hand is up against her boob.
My last feel up? Too bad she had a bra on
She removes it and dog runs off. Roomie decides to sit on the lounge chair we have by our, ahem, I mean MY bed. D6 and I are watching "The Incredibles". She is watching with us and playing with a puppy now. I tell D6 that I want something sweet. She asks if we have any kettle corn. I say I don't think so. Roomie chimes in, "Do you want me to make the banana nut bread?" She had bought a box of mix yesterday, too. Something else different. I don't really reply to her. I keep messing with D6. Like I didn't hear her. Tickle fighting again. After about 10 minutes, I ask D6 if she wants some banana nut bread. She says ok. Roomie gets up and gives us the puppy. She goes to make the bread. I hear her asking D11 if they want to watch a movie with her. D11 comes to see what I'm doing. I'm here on the computer. She goes back.
A little later, I hear the bread is ready. Roomie is making coffe too. I hear her ask D11, "Go ask you dad if he wants some bread and coffee." D11 comes to ask. I say sure. She runs off. I purposely don't follow her. "Did you ask your dad?" "He said yes." I still sit at my computer. She's not going to bring it to me, is she? I then hear, "Ask your dad if he wants this White chocolate creamer." "Dad, do you want the new creamer mom bought? Chocolate something." I don't answer, I just go to the kitchen. She is going to tire out D11. She was pouring coffee. I went and sliced myself a piece of bread. She had hers already. As I'm slicing, she comes next to me and grabs some forks from the drawer and places one by my plate.
She is walking out of the kitchen and I go to the cupboard to get a coffee cup. "That one on the island is yours." Oh, okay. I grab it and come back to my room. Scarfed it up.
THEN I hear her making room in the living room for them to watch their movie. I again hear roomie ask D11, "Did you ask your dad if he wanted to watch the movie with us?" "He's on the computer." "Oh." I hear roomie telling D6 to get a piece of bread and then, "Juli! That is WAY too big. Go share that with your dad!" "I was gonna share with daddy." D6 comes into room with more that half the bread that was left, on her plate
We share it. I go to kitchen and they have started the movie. Roomie is not on the sofa as usual. She's on the chair. Maybe leaving room on the sofa for me with D6. D11 is on the floor.
I'm gonna head over there and watch it with them. Some stupid dance movie.
Maybe D6 will fall asleep on me. Thats worth a stupid movie.
Okay, I hear "The Humpty Dance" playing over there in the movie.
Gonna go kick it old school.
H4H,
You're doing great, but I'd encourage you not to take it too far (I know, I know, you never thought you'd hear ME say THAT, did you . . . ).
When she does things for you like the banana bread and coffee and fork, say "thank you." You need to be DETACHED; you don't need to be an ass.
Treat her like you would a sister, or a friend/roommate. Wouldn't you say "thank you" to a roommate?
Finally, on a lighter note:
Quote:
D6 and I were playing around on my bed. Roomie comes in with the little momma dog. D11 had put a metal beret on her ear and it was bothering her. Looked like it hurt, but she wouldn't let roomie take it off. Roomie brings her to the bed and tries to remove it. The dog is NOT liking it. Nearly snapping at roomie. I grab her my the muzzle and hold her while roomie tries to remove it. She is having to hold the dog close to her and my hand is up against her boob.
You need to be DETACHED; you don't need to be an ass.
Damn dude. I feel like I just got pushed while I wasn't looking.
I was nice. I don't think I said "thank you", but I didn't ignore her, either. I'm being calmly upbeat. More non-chalant. Like things aren't bothering me. And nice.
But you are right, I should have said thank you.
Originally Posted By: puppy
My guess is he didn't want to see her bra-less
The funny thing is that, as I was scrolling down your post, I caught that.
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
Wonder if she saw the tickets on my dresser that were conspicuously placed.
