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That's good you told D6 that. I would be SO upset about 2 very young children not under parental or adult supervision which it sounded like (until the policeman anyway). And luckily my H and I do always tell the kids you shouldn't ever have secrets from mom or dad and have drilled that into them and I think that is a good idea. I'm glad your W won't be as involved soon; I think that's probably for the best....My H is the same way he's always buying them toys and taking them to the movies or to get cookies or whatever and I think equates that with real love or something. I do think the kids love that, but not quite the same as being a stable, dependable parent like you are!!! Karen

Buying things at each visit is just being a "Disney Dad" or "Disney Mom". The kids like it and sure they look like the fun parent, but the kids will also know in the end who really took care of them.

grrr!!! same thing happened here, and I confronted stbx in a calm way, letting him know that telling kids not to tell me something will backfire as in the future they might keep stuff from both of us (for whatever good it might've done to that thick head of his)

Do tell your kids that there are no secrets between you and them, I dont' see why not, I todl s10 that it wans't tattleting on dad, that if their safety was compromised I needed to know.

Thanks for checking in on me everyone, wow busy weekend, W had kids for 3 hours over the weekend and we didn't see her any other time. Friday/Sat/Sun and she had them 3 hours on Saturday. Can you say WAM (walk away mom)

When W did drop them off back at the house, they had D9 friend with them, so I had 5 kids to watch and we were also moving the girls up to their new room.

My brother came over to help move kids upstairs, (W dropped off kids when my Brother was there and she just turned around and left without saying a word) W's mom came over to help out also. I'm wore out, moving, cleaning, feeding the kids, trying to find some one on one time with the kids.

Had 3 dinner guest Sunday night, for Birthday Party for a good friend of the family (she helped W with kids when they were growing up, friend of W's mom and friend of crazy old neighbor lady.

Cat: I sat down with S5 who told me the story about him and his sister being brought back to W apartment, I told him he can tell me anything and he said he knew he could. Even when someone does something wrong in the house and I want to know who was responsible, the girls tend to say it wasn't me, but S5 will (if he was responsible) let me know he did it. When someone admits what they did, I typically talk to them about it in a calm manner so they are not afraid to tell me stuff.





M45
W41
M10 3/4 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never

Gosh Jeff, I just want to hug you, you seem like such a wonderul father! Your children are very blessed to have you.

Your W is so lost. Thank God you are in those kiddos' lives. Keep on, keepin on, Jeff.

Thanks NNP1965 I try my best, my kids don't have everything, I sometimes feel bad that they don't have all the "new" stuff other kids get or get to go where other kids get to go. We are a Silver Dollar City (Branson Missouri) family vs a Disneyland family. The kids have what they need, love, roof over their head, food on the table, toys, (they don't want for anything) kids always want what the other kids have, D9 wants a new game for her Nintendo, I told her I would give her jobs around the house and she can save up for a new game. (Nintendo was a gift from her grandma for her birthday) They have a computer to play other games and check out stuff on the internet (parent controls/authorization loaded on their computer)

whatdidido, you are correct, W is lost, right now she is happy in her own world. Reality hasn't set in yet, I wonder whats going to happen when she wakes up from her dream.

M45
W41
M10 3/4 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never

Hey Jeff there is nothing wrong with being a Silver Dollar City family. SDC is a fun place!! My family was the same way when I was a kid. I had to work to get things, although I still was a little spoiled. I am so proud of all the things you are doing for your kids. You are a wonderful example of an amazing father inspite of the awful things you are going through. God bless you!

Sara

I think that kids appreciate more what they have when they have to work for them and dont' have everything they want asap, it teaches them about working vs. instant gratification, about earning for wants (I like that they taught my s10 wants vs needs)

Even I was loaded I'd time how often I'd buy kids things, my s10 is also asking for games and I also told him he can do extra chores and he was excited about it.

darboyd5 - Disney Mom guess what - when I came home from work yesterday, W had let them all pickout and she bought them all a new toy - Boy its X-Mas everyday with mom.

Sara, I just want this nightmare to be over, figure, by end of summer D final. Second I need to get into a schedule with the kids getting up for school and what we do when we get home, dinner, homework, baths, etc. I also need to get my finances in order, I'll be at a point where, I'm no longer subsidizing W (she gets a direct deposit from my paycheck twice a month), I'll also have her off my medical and auto insurance, and I will cancel our cable subscription, that W had to have. Then I can figure out my budget and start a savings plan again.

Cat, my D9 was also excited about being given the opportunity to do extra work around the house, so she could earn additional money. trying to teach little ones also, they help pick-up and they get a dollar to spend at garage sales we started going to every Saturday morning, S5 seems to be the best at bargaining, he seems to come home with more and better items

I know its all for the best, just want to get to a point where I have some stability in my life, Where I don't have to rely on W for anything, Where stuff stops disappearing from the house, where I can say ok kids/house/finances are all taken care of, now I can work on me (GAL, etc)

M45
W41
M10 3/4 years
D9, D6, D6, S5
OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me
WAM (Walk Away Mom) 05/31/08
Date I'll forgive W for A = never