Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy my soul mate is leaving (gone)

Mark,

That's a great analogy.

Puppy

Mark and PDT (everyone really)

I would still be a sobbing, wallowing, miserable wreck if it weren't for you. Even though I know she is telling him she loves him, and texting and calling him, and spending time with him, I feel like I can make it out of this. Could I even trust her if she came back ? that's a tough one. She's handled some low blows. but this morning she made EVERY attempt to apologize for acting childish and she wants to try "as hard as" she can to be my friend and be pleasant. Thanks for everything guys. It's only been a month and a half, seems like a nightmare, i've been disillusioned, but I'll make it. always in the back of my mind, I want her back so much though. can't backslide. I initiated a hug tonite when she picked our son up, and she returned it. tomorrow we go to settle with a mediator. wish me luck. I'll be on here later though for any advice in the mean time. thanks.

well today is the today.....mediation at 3pm. I'm supposed to bring my 2 most recent pay stubs. I'm starting to dread this... her status on myspace says she's "super" and "relaxed" and I'm anything but ! she's got someone else to run to...I told her tonight I'll always be here as a friend and I was sorry about how her family was taking this and if she ever needed to talk to someone I can be counted on. I also told her the Lord will see us through this, and she said "everything will be ok."

I know she goes to see OM for maybe an hour or two at least every other day, and I know I have to stay strong.....mediation and divorce don't have to be the end. I gotta DB for myself and not for W.

Mark i'm amazed at how you seem to know that what she says isn't what she feels.....all that stuff about her being addicted, and the OM crap will wear off ? and OM doesn't have the ability to nurture a relationship founded on sneaking and lies ? how do you know all of this ?

has anyone on the boards been separated physically, W wants a divorce, you have been to mediation, and you ended up getting back together ? I'd love to hear a success story involving mediation....I'm assuming W prefers mediation over getting lawyers involved because a) she cares, wants to be friends, and is concerned for our sons welfare amidst a divorce, or b) knows i'll pull the adultery card and most likely c) can't afford it. anyone been through mediation and ended up working it out ???

Buster, there are success stories in the MLC forums, and some of the more accomplished posters are reconciling, also you should look in the hopefulness and piecing, and after reconciling forums.

dangit i keep looking at her phone records and see SOOOO many text between W and OM. it is killing me ! even if i back off and give her space after the mediation she is so full of his crap she won't want to come back. there has to be a better way....I'm all for going out and doing things, and there's always attractive people around, but I love my wife. why can't she see that she loves me ?

"she loves you yeah, yeah, yeah"

well for anyone who is reading this.......MarkF and Puppy Dog are right. Affairs and OM/OW are like drugs....take it from me. I smoked weed for 5 years and that's ALMOST all I cared about. my wife smoked too, but not to the degree I did. I feel like I won't get her back ever because I changed all of these things AFTER she decided to leave....and that's probably a slap in the face to her. that's probably my only doubt about the 180's and changing me for me.

Before we go to mediation today, should I tell her that as a friend whether we ever get back together or not (probably not) that it is too soon in this situation to be divorcing and separating ? she has felt this way for awhile she says, but I'm just curious if i should re-inform her of her unwise decisions.