Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums We're separated--What Now? All settled in 250 miles apart

By the way I think you handled the whole text thing perfectly and have the right attitude to let him make the next move.

Thank you, I hope the next move he makes is a nice one. Hmmmm, can't see it happening though. I'm just getting really tired of getting nothing back, although I know that's not why we are doing this.

I hope you have a great time on your trip. Try to relax and not dwell on things, although I know that'll be really hard. I hope clearing the flat on Sunday isn't too painful for you.

This weekend I am off into London on Saturday to Camden Town with my BF. Don't know if you've heard of it but there is a brilliant market there and then I'm meeting another friend on Sunday to go for a walk I think. It's a bit annoying to have to have to go into London at the weekend but it should be fun once I get there.

Hope you catch a fish to have for your supper!

Julia

I just got an email from her. She just got her internet hooked up at her house, then she responded to the things I have been asking about. i.e she still needs to take the car in like we talked about, she thanked me for the mail that I sent her, and the pets are great!! her and the puppy are regulars at the dog park and she is really enjoying him while its her turn.

She talked a bit about her school schedule and getting ready for that, and wanted to keep my in the loop. Then she said she would talk to me later.


Sounds all good. Just by chance i checked my mail 20 mins after she sent it. I am not usually home this early but i blew off the afternoon because it’s Friday. I thought later tonight I would thank her for the info and respond with the info she needed for the car, then say I am off fishing for the weekend talk to you next week and hug the dog and kitties for me, so something like that.

Thanks I hope you enjoy your weekend too, should be much better then sitting around the house. How is London this time of year. right now we are in a heat wave and it was 112 yesterday so I am hoping the mountains where I am going will be cooler.

I don’t want my moods to be dependent on her actions or lack of action, but that did make me feel better. At least by acknowledging me and answering questions, it made her look more respectful towards me. Really is it made me think that we really did make some progress as friends? I was starting to wonder about that or if I just read into things.

Hey JWS,

That's good that you got a response--that is progress as friends, IMO. I hope you have a great time fishing this weekend, it sounds wonderful.

I'm so pleased. She obviously just needed time and you gave it to her. She'll probably never know how difficult it was for you but that is real giving. I reckon that she waited until she was in the right place in her mind to say those things to you. Well done JWS you've done amazingly!

I know it is really annoying that our moods are mostly dependant on our spouses but I think it's just the way it is, at least till we can detach some more. It was really great that you got that message before you went away, now go and enjoy, take some heart from it also you know your puppy is having lots of fun!

London is rubbish at the moment! It is July, supposed to be hot and sunny and instead it has poured with really heavy rain for a week and the temperature is about 16 degrees celsius (I think that is about 60 Fahrenheit!) grrrr, I want some summer!!

Well I had a pretty good Saturday. Fishing turned out to be a bust. I did not camp because it was just too darn hot, but I got up early on Saturday and drove there. I discover that all the good spots I was told about were closed. There were no trespassing signs every where. So I ended up just picking a spot with no info and did not have any luck. That was ok I just enjoyed the morning with a book and hung out until it got unbearably hot again. Then that night a few friends and I rode out bikes down to the county fair and had a good time.

Even that was hard though because my W loved the fair. It sucks to be hunted by good memories. I have been doing a lot of reading lately and learning quite a lot. However most everything I read I see it as if it was written for us. I wish I could say look here I am right here in this chapter, read it and understand me like I am learning to understand you.

I know that right now she is so scared and worried about school that there is no room for anything else in her life. I just wish that see would acknowledge that I am here to support that and don’t want much in return other then her. (the her she wants to be not my idea of that) We did go through similar fears and distance in our relationship right before we started college, so I hope when she gets into the swing of things and those pressures reside a little there will be a starting place.

Either way all this reading is not helping detaching. I need to finish up these books then find something completely different for a while. I have started to day dream about the different ways she can come back into this M and make it all better, everything from showing up at my door to a text message. I know it’s not real and it certainly is not detaching but it does life my sprits, kind of like thinking about holding her hand. I would not say its like I walk around expecting that to happen but it’s not all that helpful either, so less reading and more detaching it the goal for the week.

I just got a text message from my W. she knows that I am driving through there next weekend on my way to see other friends and she asked if I wanted to take the Dog on my way back because she knows its been a while since i have seen him.

I texted back. I really do miss him tins buts what’s best for him right now is if he stays with you while you have time for him. I will take him in Aug when you start school so he is not a distraction initially. Thank you for thinking of me, and maybe I could stop in for a play date with him instead?

I really do what to play with him but I hope that last part does not seem like I am asking for something else. I would have had to see her anyways so just stopping in to take him to the park should not be that bad, I hope. I was having a bitter day, and my heart was feeling very cold towards everything. Then I went to church and by the end was lifted up again and walked out to find that text waiting. More proof that if I just stay out of the way God is working on things.

You saying that just made me not send a text to my h, thank you JWS

Maybe if she replies you could say something about taking the dog out or something, implying you are there to see the dog rather than interfere in her life type of thing? But don't seem unfriendly, guide yourself on her response.

That text was positive and I'm glad that it brought you out of negativity.

The county fair sounds fun, sorry you didn't get any fish. I'm glad that you had a good weekend overall.