(((Jeff))) I am sorry the evening did not go as planned. From a woman's perspective, she is punishing herself because she feels guilty. She knows, deep down inside, the angst in the house is due to her behavior, and instead of trying to correct it, she is trying to blame it on everyone one else because it makes her feel better. I wish there was some magical way to make it disappear, but I believe you are on the right path. Hopefully she will wake up soon and see that!!!
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
(((((mishka, Lola))))) Yeah, I don't get it. It isn't the first time. She'll punish herself when she is angry, which I'm sure leads to her resentment level increasing, and it becomes a feedback loop (sorry, engineer here) and just keeps building. And I don't think it is possible for anyone to break it, other than her.
Unfortunately she is the only one who can break it. Its hard, you see someone you love hurting and know that there is nothing you can do to fix them. It is one of the most helpless feelings in the world. But I guess sometimes it is just not our jobs to save everyone, and they need to save themselves. I am just sorry you are hurting.
(((Jeff)))
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Jeff...you have no idea...lmao...I just hope I get the chance to use them...sooner rather than later!!!
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Hey (((Jeff))), when she's done punishing herself, here's another idea I just remembered.
H would put hershey's kisses in my drawers for me to find. For about 6 months, I just stacked them in another drawer, & wouldn't eat them. When I was mad at him, I'd put them back on his dresser. (I can't believe how juvenile I was)
Now that I think back, it was very cute of him.
I just told him I missed them, he said, "I didn't know if you liked them because you never ate them, & sometimes you'd put them back on my dresser, & I never knew why" LMAO
Communication at it's finest.
M 19 years, MC for 8 months, DB'd for 8 months 4 kids; 18, 15, 14, & 10 I was never meant to be a doormat. It took me years of therapy to become assertive enough to stop his abuse.
What ever made you actually look, and see that he was changing, and did love you? That had to be a big step for you, to come out from behind the wall you built.
