Ok, we all could give ourselves a good kick over what we coulda, woulda, shoulda done.(just SitC humor), but that doesn't change the fact that we can't go back. We can look at where we are now and make changes and see if they make any difference and go from there. Don't beat yourself up.
Your question is a good one and only the two of you can answer it.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
It's late, west coast time. I feel like I'm here alone, just thinking over the tumult of the day. gForce got a bad surprise, kat is still in pain, WCW is getting submerged, energyAZ finally had sex, Whitneypinch is new enough to still be excited and I feel like I met a rational soul in Enlightened. I love the way Bridgestone writes, Karen always puts smilies in her posts, Kerry is eating asian food, and puppy continues to supply the 2x4s. Sara makes me sad and I always enjoy it when lwb drops by. Snow White continues on, MfromTenn faces a tough Wed, H4H is having custody issues, and rop continues to churn.
When Forrest starts to make sense, you've been here too long.
I could go on. I could mention sandi2's mission to lock a thread with a single post (lol!), as opposed to SG's single lines. And I haven't even ventured into MLC or SSM!
I don't know. Nothing to say. Just sad from mourning the loss of my M. Knowing I'm letting go. Knowing I'm through, even though I don't want to be. Knowing that's where many of us will end up. But also keeping in mind that this isn't all there is - it's a process and it helps to have friends who know what you're going through.
((((((((lodo)))))) Even though you have many friends here on the board and they are great folks remember to GAL off this BB too. Too much of this will suck you down.
While feeling so low about what is happening try to smile and laugh, have a joke of the day delivered to your email. Laughter really is good medicine!
BTW, did you notice one side of the hug is longer than the other?
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
When Forrest starts to make sense, you've been here too long.
This cracked me up! I don't understand a lot of his posts, but am afraid he'll visit my thread. lol!!
Middle of the night 'alone' is the hardest. Seems to drag on. It is a process, this hard road we are on, but we can do it. We have to, and we'll be fine. We'll be fine, then we'll be great.
It's late, west coast time. I feel like I'm here alone, just thinking over the tumult of the day. gForce got a bad surprise, kat is still in pain, WCW is getting submerged, energyAZ finally had sex, Whitneypinch is new enough to still be excited and I feel like I met a rational soul in Enlightened. I love the way Bridgestone writes, Karen always puts smilies in her posts, Kerry is eating asian food, and puppy continues to supply the 2x4s. Sara makes me sad and I always enjoy it when lwb drops by. Snow White continues on, MfromTenn faces a tough Wed, H4H is having custody issues, and rop continues to churn.
When Forrest starts to make sense, you've been here too long.
I could go on. I could mention sandi2's mission to lock a thread with a single post (lol!), as opposed to SG's single lines. And I haven't even ventured into MLC or SSM!
I don't know. Nothing to say. Just sad from mourning the loss of my M. Knowing I'm letting go. Knowing I'm through, even though I don't want to be. Knowing that's where many of us will end up. But also keeping in mind that this isn't all there is - it's a process and it helps to have friends who know what you're going through.
lodo
Hey!!! I sometimes do more than just 2x4s, ya know! Why, sometimes, it's a veritable 2x6, and other times I comment about Karen having no pants on! So THERE!!!
Hi there over here. I an not sure if excited is how I feel I am feeling a huge loss for what a great situation that I had and lost. For me I have realized through therapy that a lot of me negativity and lack of apprecaiation in my M was from my childhood and the nasty D I experienced as a kid. That is really hard to take once you realize it and turn your life around. It is really like an illness that I had and got treatment for. That is also really hard to know that and know that W does not really know that. I know it does not make it ok that some of us treat our wives poorly as we are so selfish. I have 2 of the most beautiful children in the world and I have tears everyday I don't see them. That for me is the hardest part of all of this. It's the loss of my family that makes me want to do whatever needs to be done to make this right. My W misses them when she does not have them but is not driven like I am. I have read so many books now on relationships and divorce and feel I am finally equipped with knowledge that I never had. Yes, I am moving forward with life but I miss my family ::(
Me/W: 46/36 D7.6/S6 T/M: 7.5/6.5 Bomb 12/05/07 D final: 03/03/09
You'll have to forgive my late-night ramblings. I have lots of alone time these days to let my mind wander. I know you aren't excited - the tone in your posts just reminded me of when I first started posting and was exuberant to do just about anything to make my M work.
I know how you feel. I had fallen into a low level depression and rather than saying anything, my W decided to emotionally divorce herself. Or at least, that compounded issues that were already latent in her. Then, of course, she decided to sleep with a coworker, and then told me she wanted to establish a R with him instead of work on our M. So even if she decided to come back it's hard for me to see how we could get past the damage done. I'm not shutting the door completely, but it is time to move on.
I know you miss your family. That's why you have to keep trying, even when things look bleak. You'll know when you have no more to give.
