Hope, just texted you. H is working overtime tomorrow, no one to watch the babies. I am off for 4 days this weekend. What's up with your schedule? Maybe I could get a sitter.......
What night are you planning on seeing Sex and the City? We could do a virtual movie if you want. No cosmopolitans for me though! I am really looking forward to it. Let me know what you think. kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Hurray for frustration! Many times that allows you to see what's really going on.. break through the angst ridden thoughts.
Good ideas are always good ideas. Bad ideas acted upon can have far reaching negative results.
Rule of thumb.. always wait 48 hours before implementing something. If it's a good idea now, it will be a good idea in 2 days. If you're a professional procrastinator, take a week!
Your husband, my husband with their new relationships are all wrapped up in the pink puff of love. When I saw my spouse today, the blue in his eyes was the soft color of when he is happy, at peace. He's in a better place in his mind than he was with me.
Sometimes I think, you just have to look at these guys and say to yourself, "He loved me the best he knew how." In the same vein, "I loved him the best I knew how." The question is, once accepting the flaws in ourselves and others, can the union be renewed?
When frustration hits too hard, when you feel shredded in your heart, soul.. it's okay and better to take a time out. Let yourself heal. Take a breather. Be the mom. Take care of yourself.
You're a beautiful wonderful woman, ms lwb.. don't you fergit it!
Rule of thumb.. always wait 48 hours before implementing something. If it's a good idea now, it will be a good idea in 2 days. If you're a professional procrastinator, take a week!
Hi mazzimom! I love this rule--and I'm a professional procrastinator definitely!
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Your husband, my husband with their new relationships are all wrapped up in the pink puff of love. When I saw my spouse today, the blue in his eyes was the soft color of when he is happy, at peace. He's in a better place in his mind than he was with me.
I just doubt though whether that is "love" though. Maybe more lust, MLC fogginess, wanting to escape, infatuation, etc.
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Sometimes I think, you just have to look at these guys and say to yourself, "He loved me the best he knew how." In the same vein, "I loved him the best I knew how." The question is, once accepting the flaws in ourselves and others, can the union be renewed?
Yes, I think you're probably right. I just think I (and everyone else here) am deserving of an H that won't cut & run when you are depressed or sick or whatever, and I don't think I have that. Karen
Its been that way for a long time, him thinking the neighbors are 'lame' and boring, because no one will go out with him at night. He was ridiculous. I wanted to tell him today that he is a very unattractive person to me. Everything about him feels wrong.
My W is the same way, neighbor, mean old lady, but if you yell back at her she laughs, or ask her whats wrong, she opens up and lightens up. We lived next to her for 5 years now, W knows how she is, but W is not willing to make the effort, just assumes neighbor hates her. W makes no effort with any of the neighbors, I guess becasue she knows she is leaving, why be nice to people if you won't see them. (bad attitude)
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I was thinking to myself today, if I had the money, enough money, to get divorced and keep the house, would I file right now. My answer is YES.
I feel the same way, I'm done -same old complaints, its a lot nicer when she is gone and I don't have to deal with the hurt I feel from her running around behind my back, making up stuff like where she is going, etc. it gets old quick. I'm lucky, W leaving me and kids in our home, I don't think she will ever upset the kids home, she doesn't want to be here and she doesn't want to deal with the kids. She confuses me, she wants out, (signed lease on apartment) and has OM, will get a fulltime job to support herself, but doesn't want to Divorce me, She is treating this like a trial seperation, In my head its over becasue of OM,
I'm going to be happy, helpful, forgiving, patient and loving. Not just to W and kids, but to everyone I know and meet. This is me, this is how I want to live my life, this may not be the best course of action to save a marriage, but its the best way to live my life.
We all have a long haul ahead of us good or bad it's the path we choose thats important.
M45 W41 M10 years D9, D6, D6, S5 OM confirmed 12/07 merry christmas to me PA confirmed 03/08 no sex yet ?? let me hope !!! W moving out June 1st - 10 days - already signed lease
H is very very angry with me. I refused sex yet again. I refuse it almost daily. He wants something different than I (tension relieving non emotional sex) want, so therefore I can't. He was very angry when I left for work. Him being mad doesn't affect me too much anymore, I just worry that he will be spiteful with the kids (taking them more, etc). He is projecting his anger on me, I see this. He still blames me 100% for the marriage failure. I know this.
I am looking into a house down the street for sale. Its smaller than ours, but I could maybe afford it after I pay off H. Then I could keep the girls in the neighborhood, and have a fresh start myself. I need to go over the financials with a professional. H knows I am looking into this (helped me do it), maybe that is setting him off? He swears he isn't dating/seeing anyone. That doesn't matter to me, he still doesn't want to come back.
Do they do Retroville even if reconsiliation isn't your ultimate goal? Maybe that is something you could look into and say hey we need this break, we will do this workshop and see where we are then. Just a thought, you can tell me if that is stupid and I will be ok with that. kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
kat, I think they open the doors for anyone at Retro, really.
I stopped H's sexual advances today and said "Answer me 2 questions" and he agreed.
Me: Are we getting back together?
H: No.
Me: Are we divorcing?
H: Yes.
So I said "Then there will be no sex". Looking back that was kind of controlling, but its the truth. H would laugh in my face if I offered up MC or Retro. He is so done with me.
Karen