Here is the strange part.......no wait, it's all strange
He said he misses me, he often thinks about me, he thinks about the love we shared, he said he's never loved nor will love someone like that again.
He said he's built these walls up to protect his feelings.
I said since he thinks of me and misses me that should tell him something....he said it does, but he simply cannot go back as his walls are built.
He said he knows many people who are still depressed and hurting over the loss of thier marriage, and what did I want him to be like? His friend Teddy?? Who cries everyday for the loss of his wife.
I said no, but I gurantee you anyone of these people would give anything to have that second chance. He agreed.
BUT
He still goes back to my disrespecting him.
He still blames me for things, like......he alienated his friends/family just for me.
How I, yes I caused friction in his family.
I had to defend myself at that time.....because I bent over backwards for them, they alienated me because I have backbone!!
He would purposely not look at attractive women while we walked through the mall so it didn't upset me.
He went on and on about all the things I did.......nothing on what he did, then near the end he said ok, so some of it was his fault....
My mind is mush......just when I think I can move forward he calls and does this to me.
WHY????
I started crying.....I couldn't help it, I've been hurting and missing him so bad as of late.
I told him I loved him, I missed him so very much, I said I wanted him to come home.....
He said AGAIN, that he would check his schedule and we would talk.
I asked him did he miss me? He said quietly.......yes.
I asked him if he still loves me....he said we'll talk.
I said it's a simple yes or no.
He said he's late for work.
Change the Policy. Allow PM's Free all of us.
Also some new and improved emoticons would be nice!
I know it's hard, but put down that crack pipe and step away.
Until he comes to you with something concrete, something real, some real evidence that he wants to do something about his feelings you need to move forward with your life.
Figure out where your problems in the marriage were. Not for him, but for you so that your next relationship whether that be with him or someone else will flourish.
As for the lawyer, I think I'd march my butt down to the office and refuse to leave until I got an answer as to where my motion was.
BFM
There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you. David Burns, Intimate Connections
I cannot believe I cried and told him I wanted him to come home.
I have not cried about this man in awhile now.
Now I know why he has not sold the house......if things do not work out for him and OW, here's good ole me......waiting like some idiotic fool for something that used to be.
Why couldn't he have called and said he'll be over to get the outside ready to put the house up.
Why did he have to go back into the past once again?
Boy if this doesn't make you feel weak and foolish I don't know what does.
I am just kicking myself right now.
Mondays suck!
Change the Policy. Allow PM's Free all of us.
Also some new and improved emoticons would be nice!
You're fine. You needed to get it out. There's no shame in your game woman.
Just walk it out.
And if it's any consolation to you if you think you've made a fool of yourself, there's a good chance I'm gonna do the same thing here shortly so at least we'll be in good company!
I'm sorry all of this is dragging at you today Jeanette. Maintain your calm and move forward. Try not to dwell on what was said and what you wish had been said and all that. What is done is done.
Get that house ready, get it on the market, and get out!
((((Jeanette)))))
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!