jmw, to keep it short as i am sure youve followed some of my thread. if anyone at all would have told me any of this was going to happen i wouldn't believe them, no-one i know can believe it and it is 3 long years now. because we only co-habited and never got on with getting married,(something else he denied although he asked me on several occasions) the property remained in his sole name, and so did the mortgage, because I am one of the rare people that dont spend others money and take others property I didn't have my name put on the mortgage etc as I wasn't working as I said because ex had asked me to be a sahm, then when he left and I have to say it was on the spur of the moment decision, nobody was more shocked than myself he stated that we could continue to live in the house and he would help with the bills etc and continue to pay mortgage, well things turned when hed been left a couple of months and was obviously with ow then, he stopped helping with the bills and tried forcing son at every occasion to spend time with skank, son wasn't having any, he took son away for the weekend march last year, and son as told me it was a weekend where all dad went on about was the fact that he wanted to see more of him but he would have to spend time with the now new wife, because son didn't agree to their little plan, dad hasn't contacted son at all in 14 months, and because son wasn't playing ball and I wasn't forcing him to, and I refused to play the middle man, ex phoned and said he was sending estate agents round to value the place, I think that was done to scare us, the next step was to send a notice to end our time in the place and telling us we owed him a huge amount of rent, and then the finale came when he sent notice of 28 days to get out for trespassing, he took me to court and it was all going through that he was going to evict his only child on to the streets and make him homeless when as a stroke of luck and much hard work with the homeless I managed to get a house with the local authorities, my lawyer was fighting him on the childrens grounds to stay in the house until son was 18, and says that the judge probably would have granted us to stay, but who knows it could have gone the other way and ex was pushing for it to happen.
so we packed up and left and then ex sent a letter to my lawyer saying he was astonished and deeply upset by the fact that we had left and not given him notice, he took nine months going to court etc to get us out and then wanted me to call and tell him we were on our way and where we'd left the keys, havent heard from him since. my barrister on the day in court said she could tell ex didn't want to be there at all she could tell by his bodily manner, she thought it was a case of him being pushed to do it by the skank and once the ball got rolling he couldn't stop it, he didn't and couldn't look at me and looked shabby and actually pain written all over his face. So I guess if I knew then what I know now, I would have taken everything he offered me, ie name on mortgage, carried on working, have my own money, dont get me wrong the court said that if I had put on an extension or built a new bathroom then that would have gone on as a beneficial interest and then i would have had the same righs as being married, but because I was a sahm, i was classed as a scrounger and hadn't contributed to the home, although it was me that did and paid for all the gardening, decorating, furniture, food etc he paid the bills and the mortgage so in a real world I did pay my share. It was only the other day I re-read his statement to the court and when you read deep into it there is nothing but lies in it, but I do believe he will reap what he sows, his new wife his a gold digger, a user and has had more relationships than hot dinners, I have said from the start he will end up with nothing and no-one, he had just come into some inheritance from his dad dying, son nor I have had nothing from it she has had the lot, and now they want the money from the house, which is still sat there empty, 6 months on. ex wanted us out because he stated he couldn't afford the current situation of 2 mortgages and everything else, well it is sat there empty, looking like a disused barn, he doesn't tend to it at all, I think when it does sell there wont be anything left money wise as his new wifey if famous for spending blokes cash, getting them into debt and then dumping them. sorry for being so lengthy, and rambling, hope your case doesn't get as bad as this.
Mandyloo, I just think UK law works for married couples only, although it seems that you have taken a bad fall you are actually in a better place to heal.
Own space and no control from ex and his wife, you are surviving without support and that is what is important, your son has a strong role model.
I'm sure if you had fought on until the end that your ex would have had to allow you to remain in the family home, but then he would have had a hold over you.
I am in a fighting position and thats what I am going to do, fight all the way.
my H is suggesting that I couldn't have got to where I am without his input, he is being proved wrong on a daily basis.
He has lost so much over the past two years and he has managed to do so all by himself, I hope one day he does realise what he has lost, but like so many I think it will take forever for that to happen.
The one thing he has lost is the respect people had for him, including our sons, to loose the respect of your children is the saddest thing to happen.
jmw, I do agree with you, and have to admit the fact that yes life is better in our new home where he cannot control us, and I am sure deep down he didn't really want to put us out, it is like the lawyers said someone as mentioned issuing proceedings and it as escalated into something he couldn't control anymore. it was out of his hands and I personally think it was done to scare son and I into doing as he wished and me make son play happy families with him and new wifey, son as a mind of his own and as he says now, well dad can't think that much of me to disown me like he as for her, no-one at all can believe what he as done, but the sheer fact that he doesn't contact or wish to see his only fledgling is proof of the pudding that something is wrong with the guy whether it be mlc or not, his son was the be all and end all in his life, and how can you try and have a relationship in future years if at all when you threw your only child on the streets. I went past the old home yesterday it is sad how he as let it go, as I said he was in such a rush to get us out and get it sold, the garden is getting so overgrown he will never sell it, if he doesn't want to do it surely he could pay someone to go do it with all his money, all the neighbours are disgusted as it is really pulling the area down. I guess he just cannot be bothered with the old place as it was linked to us, he doesn't get seen up there but wifey does. ex has also lost nearly everything he had when the house goes she is the only thing he will have left, he has no friends, no family, nothing from the past like personal items because he didn't take them with him, but like I said he will end up with nothing and nobody, and it is coming true, I do wonder from time to time and you must do too, do you think they are happy in their new life and do you think they ever think of their kids, I mean not to contact your only child for 14 months I find appalling, you fight for everything you can jmw and fight hard my girl. I am in the middle of fighting him for son's bank accounts at the moment, when we went through court, he eventually offered me ten percent of the selling price of the house when it did sell and I asked for son's bank accounts to be handed over to my name as part of my agreement, he agreed to that and should have sorted it as says in the court order by jan 4th this year, he hasn't done it so it looks like me taking him to court now, but for my son's sake I will fight him every step of the way
