Long story but he is home and H and I getting along even better and communicating more. He spent the whole day with me yesterday and we even went on a Walk*.
*( I love "em he hates 'em)*
This to me is paramount it says H is connected to me and wantas my Happiness too and that he really is trying. When my son came to talk to my H I was nervous and then I wasnt cause I know my H has grown so much as a Human Being these past few months.
So all in all good... there have been a few bumps and H being moody. I know now though after are talks that he is trying and he will keep trying to get better and get along with me better. We have come a long way... light years from where we were before the BOMB.
So believe in Miracles and work your a** off to change and be a better YOU. Even if you dont save the Marriage you will feel so much better and Life will be so much richer. If you save the Marriage too then great but trust me stopping the D is no magic pill it takes still alot of hard work. I have been piecing for 2 years and it is just starting to feel good. ...... like I am close to feeling that light on my face not looking at it from a distance. All my best to you all and God bless....
To Do List: For this month.... 1) Keep working on me. 2) Remember H is Human too. 3) Keep letting go of old: feelings,hurts and resentments. 4) Smell the roses along the way. 5) Adjust to the changes....
Start over with #1... All my best to you all, ~Ali
I have been posting in SSM~ and getting better in that aspect.
But what ROOT and RED are going thru ?
I recently have felt the same. Just a month ago I was feeling Happily Married. Like WOW~ this is how it feels to be "Happily Married"
And now my H is going thru alot of stress and his behavior mimmicks that of when he is cheating....
So I am insecure and then the viscious cycle starts.... I am trying actively to avoid this from happening.
I will be posting here also to try and get some more insight and solutions.... I know I dont feel as happy as I did in these last posts... the piecing continues.
I am doing better.... I am finding that the more I realize "WE" are not who we used to be. The better. I can talk to him , he will listen and we arent the same people we were before the BOMB. It is still hard but he isnt the same and I can say things I could have never said before. He makes me feel x, y or z but now I can actually call him on it ... So me shutting down isnt helpful.... talking is. I havent stated my fears { he used to cheat and go out alot.. etc etc etc...} I will work thru those.
I have stated however that his moods are affecting me and that is he wants me to be happy this is not the way to get it...
