Sara, wow. I crave stability so I can't imagine doing something like that. But some people are wired differently. You never know what's behind closed doors. Maybe there was an A, and they realized they need a fresh start. Maybe their M is falling apart because of their son. Maybe they just loved Texas. Who knows, I am just glad they did it together.
You're right. Certainly there is more. He had an affair with his secretary 2 years ago, and they went to Retrouvaille. She's the one who recommended it to me. Occasionally I asked how they were doing, and she gave non-committal answers. It's possible there could have been more trouble on that front again.
sara, I don't think there is anything weird about that, personally. but then again, I'm a mover. I like heading to different areas of the country. I would move to certain areas of VA in a heartbeat (if I won the lottery, lol). and when h and I were together, we moved 4 times in 5 or 6 years, and I fully intended to move at least a few more before we settled for a while (all for his job, he kept getting promoted and they each meant a move).
15 years ago I worked with a woman who was so angry. she was in her 50s and her best friend (they had been friends their whole life) decided to move to florida. she was pissed beyond belief. the friend's kids were grown and on their own, but she did not think her friend should abandon her kids to go live in another state. felt it was her responsibility to keep the home fires burning for them forever, I guess.
I remember being really shocked by that reaction. I guess the way I see it is life is too short to stay somewhere just because you've been there for a while.
were you close to her?
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
okay, just read your and lwb's posts. okay, so more to the story. could be they just need a change of scenery. could be more behind it.
I guess for me, though, I don't see it as a lack of stability to move. stability to me is (was) my husband and my kids. didn't matter where I lived. don't get me wrong, I'm not looking to move constantly, but the adventure of living in a new place can be a lot of fun!
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
No. I wasn't close to her. I just saw the daughter of a woman in the office who had been with her the whole 10 years. And the daughter said that her mom was caught by surprise too. My husband thinks they were so beset by financial problems and legal problems with the son, that they just need a break. But is buying a 5th house in another state and starting a new life a break? Is moving a few states over enough to leave behind big financial problems?
Ten years ago today I got married. The weather was beautiful just like today, and I remember being thrilled because we could do pictures in the park across from the church.
I am reflective as the morning progresses. Fleeting thoughts. What made my H unfaithful? What is in the future? Will my girls be ok? But good things too. Knowing I will survive/thrive no matter what. That I am stronger now because of this experience. That I deserve more, and only time will tell whether H will be in the picture or not, giving me what I deserve. He can't right now.
H will avoid all topics regarding today, but that's ok.
Journaling:
Yesterday, H called to tell me he was going to be late getting here (so I could work). But....big change.......he gave me plenty of notice (so I could tell the girls)and found coverage for them all on his own. Four weeks ago, he texted me saying "I'm not coming" about 5 minutes before I had to leave. Big change. Means nothing other than he is possibly realizing we can do this peacefully.
He called me at work later, saying he was in traffic, but had called our neighbor (where the girls were) and informed her. He ended up being here on time anyway.
I bet you'll agree that a truly wonderful thing to come out of that beautiful day 10 years ago are those two precious daughters of yours... Hug them extra tight today...
Yes, L, I totally agree. If I hadn't gotten married, I would not have the 2 beautiful things that help me get out of bed every morning. I am blessed. If H *does* bring today up, I will thank him for that.
