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Thanks Michelle and GF!!


That book really is great. It is helping me see that I can work through these feelings and H CAN earn my trust back. I have been afraid that...when it comes right down to it...I won't be able to forgive him. I now think it is possible, it will just take a lot of hard work from both of us. I really want him to read it. I think I may bring it up when I see him Wednesday, although it is really long and I am not sure he will be up for it. I was thinking maybe I could go through and highlight things for him to read. We'll see what he says.


You are right...weird...I really expected that R talk to be our last one.

So, since H has been making all the contact, I was planning on sending H a text today telling him I hope he has a good day at work today. Well, he beat me to the punch. Just a few minutes ago he called me just to talk and to see how my day was going. ..What has gotten into this man??

Heh....sounds pretty nice actually. My H has been sending me little friendly text messages a few days a week. I like it. Before the A, neither one of us ever used text messaging. Now we use it a lot. Sort of strange, really.

Anyhow...sounds like a lot of positive things going on for you. I wish you all the best!!

That book sounds interesting, but I have been sort of keeping myself away from those books for a little while. I was getting a little obsessive reading them and comparing myself to the people in the books. It was really depressing me. So I decided to lay low on the R books for a little while and read some fun things. Maybe once I am done reading a few more fun books, I will pick up that one.

Sara

...us either. It kind of makes me feel weird because that was his main communication with OW, but better that he text me than her so I am going along with it.

I understand what you mean about the books. I was worried about starting to read R books again and didn't want to start obsessing again. They can be depressing sometimes. Nothing wrong with taking a break and doing some fun reading.

Another baby step.....Excellent!



Just my opinion, but I think I would hold off on asking H to read the book for at least another couple of weeks. Your sitch seems to be progressing very well at the moment with lots of baby steps. Perhaps a giant leap can wait awhile. H might not be ready for that just yet. Remember, he said he wanted to take things slowly. My H said the same thing, and in his mind, that meant he couldn't make any promises and he didn't want to feel pressured to make any.

You are probably right GF, it is probably too soon to ask him to read the book.

But, what I am afraid of is moving along just like we are and never talking about it for fear of disrupting the calm. I don't want all of this to get swept under the rug. At the same time I don't want him to feel like we are going to have a R talk every time he sees me. ...I guess I have to keep that whole patience thing in mind.

There is a balance there.

Have a couple very nice weeks, then bring it up. Then don't bug him about it for a month, then maybe have another talk?

You have to have good moments in between talks to build on.

I am glad things are going so well! He really is working up some great momentum!

Thanks Michelle...sometimes someone says something and it clicks. That clicked for me.

H's mood on myspace for the last couple of months has gone back and forth between "indifferent" and "apathetic"...now today it is "optimistic". I wonder if our R has anything to do with his newfound optimisim??

Wow! How nice that he's acting positive!