From what I understand she is spending time with her sister, and a couple of girlfriends from work (all smoke).
As I said I am hoping it is a phase and she will come out of it, A few months ago she was trying really hard and I was unresponsive (depression) and she said that if I/we didn't sort it out by Feb the house will be sold. This was somewhat unfair as I was in no real position to respond well and went further downhil (more depression). Since she went for D I sorted myself out, I have got AD's and I have stopped smoking maruana as well (yes I did and we did together but she did not smoke much) and feel much better for it.
Maybe I just need to wait for her like she waited for me, its just we didn't get to the same place at the same time and I just have to hang in there until she does.
I have done some snooping (bad eh) and have not come accross anything that would suggest anything, though I am not sure what to look for.
She starts a new job next month and will be away from her work friends (the deadbeat ones) she also hates her job so this may bring a bit of clarity to her I hope.
You guys provide great support and my Mum and sister have been rocks for me, they want W and I to stay together. I will continue improving myself, keep up my 180's and make our home comfortable so its a nice place for me W.
9 weeks in so far, gonna hang in there, as it is all too much to lose. The rollercoaster is not so fun at times but may we all end on a high.
How is she testing me with the 'sex' thing may I ask? and what do I do (I think it was just a hurtful comment mind as she was in a bit of a stroppy mood)
Saffie, Sandi thank you for your responses and your interest, they help greatly.
Last edited by GavinO; 03/28/0804:22 PM.
Me: 30 W: 31 T: 9.5 yrs M: 4 Yrs No Kids, 1 cat Had a bad year Turmoil started 22/Jan/08 Seperated, same house 30/Jan/08 Wanted D: 2/Feb/08 Going downhill and towards D with nothing stopping her!
Yes, when I asked her about her evening a week or so ago she said she 'Got drugs and had sex' i repeated this back to her as I was listening and she said 'what do you think' She was in a bit of a stroppy mood (drug related comedown or hangover or something maybe?)
She is still smoking though I think it is a bit less than she was somewhat, she is out on Saturday for a smoke round one of her friends.
Me: 30 W: 31 T: 9.5 yrs M: 4 Yrs No Kids, 1 cat Had a bad year Turmoil started 22/Jan/08 Seperated, same house 30/Jan/08 Wanted D: 2/Feb/08 Going downhill and towards D with nothing stopping her!
Gavin, I'm here for your daily cheer up. You will do well. Guys, I could really use a friend right now. I'm really lost with my situation. I'm very close to getting divorced. NC for 3 months. She is continually threating that I am "stalking" her through her lawyer. Honestly, the only thing I have done is checked her e-mail once since I filed. That revealed all of her darkness. Lesbian trysts and even inquiring about being an escort. Wow...
