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ACJ, I never tell him NOT to speak to anyone in my family...and i don't tell anyone in my family NOT to talk to him either...but ugh!!!!


SO FRUSTRATING!!!!

He is the type that needs to be needed and I am fairly independent and so, for him this is good...I guess...


Aug '06: H moved out
July '08: H had a kid with the OW
May 12 '09: emancipation day

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller

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Journaling:

I just posted something on anew2morow's thread, was watching a life coach on GMA and she talked about dreams and how you can find solutions for yourself regarding difficult situations through dreaming because you are not pre-occupied with waking thoughts and interruptions. Makes sense to me and I have been having dreams about MLM coming home but in the dream we encounter problems...like his family or my family...

Anyhow, it clears up what the situations are...I still have yet to come to a conclusion and him really being home...but at least I am dreaming that he WANTS to come home. and I do thin khe really DOES...maybe I am not ready for that or maybe I am sending signals that prevent him---out of fear or whatever---from vocalizing that...I don't know....

Anyhow, I heard that Neil Diamond song "Heart light" and the chorus was what really hit me:

Turn on your heartlight
Let it shine wherever you go
Let it make a happy glow
For all the world to see
Turn on your heartlight
In the middle of a young boy's dream
Don't wake me up too soon
Gonna take a ride across the moon
You and me

And home's the most excellent place of all
And I'll be right here if you should call me
Turn on your heartlight
Let it shine wherever you go
Let it make a happy glow
For all the world to see
Turn on your heartlight
In the middle of a young boy's dream
Don't wake me up too soon
Gonna take a ride across the moon
You and me
Turn on your heartlight now
Turn on your heartlight now


Anyhow, that is how I feel right now...


Aug '06: H moved out
July '08: H had a kid with the OW
May 12 '09: emancipation day

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller

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Vali, you were listening to Neil Diamond, my heart is pitter pattering.

That is a great song, neil is the man when it comes to the language of love.


Ian


M- 48
XW- mentally 17
KIDS- 3- S19, D23, D28
Married- 17 years
Divorce final- 10/16/09

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((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))) You and I are really going through the emotional stuff right now


Me 43
XH 45
M 2.7.88
Divorce 7.10.09
Kids D20,S17 & D15
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Hey Vali,

You are doing great, I'm glad. \:\)

There are those days that still get us down. And yes, they don't last as long. Thank goodness. And yes, we recover more quickly now. Whew.

You are going through a lot of emotional stuff and, as you know, the only way through it is through it.

Keep moving forward. Keep being Vali and all will be well.

Hope you have a great weekend.

Love,
Shades

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Ian, I have a thing for Jewish men, what can I say??? MLM has a Jewish nose and we both come from a lineage of sephardic jews....go figure.

And you're right about Neil....he is golden! Heartlight is one of my all-time favorite songs...and when I feel not very generous towards people I hear this song in my head and then I am reminded about what really matters...

V


Aug '06: H moved out
July '08: H had a kid with the OW
May 12 '09: emancipation day

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller

Joined: May 2006
Posts: 3,848
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Alison, music is very important to me...and I have eclectic tastes...


So, when I feel down, I turn on disco or salsa/meregue because it makes me want to dance and how can you feel down when you want to DANCE??????


So, if you find yourself in a real funk...kinda like now...then put on something that makes you happy...or do something that makes you happy and it will help pull you out of the doldrums! Works for me practically every time!!!

Hugs,
Vali


Aug '06: H moved out
July '08: H had a kid with the OW
May 12 '09: emancipation day

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller

Joined: May 2006
Posts: 3,848
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Posts: 3,848
Shades, hope you are doing well, sweets! I know things can get emotional...I can only imagine how hard it is for you...with the girls and how silly your H is acting.

I am hoping that things improve in your sitch....

Love you!

Vali


Aug '06: H moved out
July '08: H had a kid with the OW
May 12 '09: emancipation day

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller

Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 10,147
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Well, Neil knows how to heal broken hearts as well you know....

Song Sung Blue:

Song sung blue, everybody knows one.
Song sung blue, every garden grows one.
Me and you are subject to, the blues now and then,
But when you take the blues and make a song,
You sing them out again, sing them out again,

Song sung blue, weepin' like a willow,
Song sung blue, sleepin' on my pillow.
Funny thing, but you can sing it with a cry in your voice,
And before you know it start to feelin' good,
You simply got no choice.

Funny thing, but you can sing it with a cry in your voice,
And before you know it start to feelin' good, you simply got no choice.

Song sung blue, weepin' like a willow,
Song sung blue, sleepin' on my pillow.
Funny thing, but you can sing it with a cry in your voice,
And before you know it start to feelin' good, you simply got no choice....


That does it, I'm renting The Jazz Singer tonight and getting some Ben and Jerry's...... Too Girly??????


Ian


M- 48
XW- mentally 17
KIDS- 3- S19, D23, D28
Married- 17 years
Divorce final- 10/16/09

Joined: May 2006
Posts: 3,848
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Ha! you're funny! Chica said you would respond with another Neil Diamond tune!

I like that tune too... \:\) Neil is the master...next to Marvin Gaye. yeah, I have varied and eclectic tastes!!! Chica and I love the Disco sound and of course, Salsa/Merengue...


Okay, I am pulling out my essential Neil Diamond and playing it !!!!

never too girly, Ian, never too girly....

Vali


Aug '06: H moved out
July '08: H had a kid with the OW
May 12 '09: emancipation day

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." -Ferris Bueller

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