Well, H is pretty sick I guess. He's going to a doctor today - which he NEVER does - so that concerns me a bit. He's been in pain he said for days straight now and nothing helps. It's a bad pain from the base of his neck all the way up to the front of his head. He went to the nurse at work yesterday and she had him lay down since he didn't look good and told him he couldn't come back to work without seeing a doctor first. Yikes. I'm concerned and hope he's okay!
Other than that, nothing happening with me at all.
Okay, so H called me today to apologize for not calling me back last night. I called him to see if he can get D from school since I was stuck at work late and wouldn't get her until after school closed. He went home and slept due to his head.
Anyway, he said he would call me after the doctor and if he has him go to the hospital. When hanging up, I told him I loved him (I know, smack me). He said he knows I do. I asked if he can just say it back to me even if it's a lie so I can feel a bit of love. He responded saying "no, because when I do say it to you then, you won't know if I'm being real or lying." He said that....."WHEN I do say it to you". That means he loves me right?!
I told him I loved him (I know, smack me). He said he knows I do.
Ok, I'll smack you! They know we love them, he told you himself, so don't say it again, ok? Also, don't ask him to say "I love you" back because right now he doesn't feel it. I am not saying he doesn't love you, but MLC is all about feelings and right now he doesn't feel it. Does that make sense? You asking him to do that is just putting pressure on him and is going to push him further away. Besides which, he is right, wouldn't you rather hear him say it and know that he means it? Otherwise it's just words.
Yea, I know. I just needed to hear it at that moment since it was a good moment and I miss feeling loved. That's all. He was light-hearted about it too so I don't think I messed anything up with that...hope not anyway!
H's result from doctor is that he's got a very badly strained neck. He's off work now and taking prescribed muscle relaxers so I'm guessing he might be NC'ing me b/c he's out cold. Not sure. Kinda discouraged today with it all really. Wondering if I should continue or not even though the thought of divorcing really upsets me.
When hanging up, I told him I loved him (I know, smack me). He said he knows I do. I asked if he can just say it back to me even if it's a lie so I can feel a bit of love. He responded saying "no, because when I do say it to you then, you won't know if I'm being real or lying." He said that....."WHEN I do say it to you". That means he loves me right?!
Claim it.
And then quit being a dork.
Also note here >> "no, because when I do say it to you then, you won't know if I'm being real or lying." ... that the man has accidently discovered one of the ways in which women's minds tend to operate (screwy) .
He had you over a barrel with that one statement...so don't go confirming you're a dork.
It means he's "onto" you. Figured out how you think. Not the "SMART" way you think but that stupid way that all of us women have a tendency to revert to in some form or fashion.
Lighten up.
And good grief, why would YOU drop the rope just because HIS neck is out of joint? That's basically what it boils down to, Dar. He's not all hearts and butterflies and worse, he hurts and isn't letting you take care of him. This is a spirit of offense that's making you feel bad. Trust me. One rides on my back every day. I didn't even realize when the sucker dug his heels in for the long haul. Don't let this one attach itself to you.
Is that plain enough or do you want to just go get an 8-Ball and ask it what it's sources point to?
No, I think I get it. I'm just really upset by all of this and thought after 18 months it was supposed to get better. Since it's not, I'm wondering if I should just let it all go.
They know we love them, he told you himself, so don't say it again, ok? Also, don't ask him to say "I love you" back because right now he doesn't feel it. I am not saying he doesn't love you, but MLC is all about feelings and right now he doesn't feel it. Does that make sense? You asking him to do that is just putting pressure on him and is going to push him further away. Besides which, he is right, wouldn't you rather hear him say it and know that he means it? Otherwise it's just words.
. 