Timing is everything. Remaining calm. Finding the "right" words so as not to make him defensive. You said maturely....bleh!! I hate being mature! Let's see if someone like Snodderly who is always mature has any suggestions. I did have to have this conversation with my Husband but I cheated and wrote an email. I can see if I still have it in my MLCBS file and forward it to you. He did take it very well and apologized.
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
"H, in future I would very much appreciate it if you wouldn't discuss me or my problems with your girlfriend. And certainly not infront of me or in my home. There are things that do not concern her and this was one of them. I hope you can understand and that you can respect it. Cinders"
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
Thanks Faith, I think he will not think it was fine, brief and to the point...but oh well, at least this way I have set my own boundary in this. It was just unacceptable to me to have him talking to her whilst sitting on my desk....now my desk is polluted !
And ....he IS a schmuck ....for having done it in the first place !
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
I am so sorry to hear this about your dog. I cannot believe your H took a call from OW like that. Well, yes, I can. He is in MLC.
I think you are strong now and you have set a boundary--he should keep his phone on vibrate and answer the darned call later.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Cinders, sorry to hear about your dog. They are the great friends and it hurts to see them this way.
I am proud of how you are handling everything. I will say that I know when people do the right thing they seem to be attacked more. You must be doing something very right
Me:56, W:51 D:26,S:24,S:22 Married:18 Bomb 9/27/06 Separated 11/27/06 Divorced 10/6/08 Leaving it up to God