Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums We're separated--What Now? Is this counselor's idea a good one?

I was definitely in Stage 1 before and think I'm heading into Stage 2. I totally agree about re-hashing the past. Counseling just really pushed us into our own corners: me saying that marriage is worth working on, him saying he was so unhappy he didn't know.

I just heard back from a SBT therapist I found in my area. I'm glad I kept looking b/c this site wasn't able to give me a lead.

Anyway, I had a really good talk with the therapist and definitely feel that she's who I want to see in a little bit. My husband has said that he's not opposed to MC down the line, after he's gotten some sessions under his belt. Turns out that the T that I spoke with is very close with the T my husband is going to. The best thing about this is I found out that his T is very pro-marriage.

I have a bit of hope for some good movement down the line. I told the T that I will be calling her in the future for MC, whether it's me alone or with my H. She said that we could definitely do this and she would work with my H's therapist while seeing just me. Happy, hopeful day. (It helps that it's 70s and sunny and I've been gardening for a couple of hours. One of my favorite things.)

I know--I wish she was still here, too. And Virginia. They truly are great people, too. So are Tia and JJ...barely know Sage.

A lot of people love Retrouvaille. It doesn't work for some...but if your H is willing.

Money is such a stressor now. I guess it always has been and always will be, but it's a darn shame.

cw,

That he's even willing to consider MC (even if just for communication) is a good thing. Like you my H and I are on opposite sides of the fence. I may suggest MC for communication only (he wouldn't consider anything else).

I also think it's great that the T you found can work with you and his T. Good stuff.

Enjoy the gardening.

Now that I've had more time to think about it, I am really happy he's found the therapist that he has. Just hope he sticks with it! Working on our communication makes sense to him since we have young kids and will still need to communicate. I'm just hoping that better communication will be just another positive he'll note as reason to try to keep our marriage together.

Well, good communication sure can't hurt....