Well, what a day yesterday, we went to the marriage counselor together yesterday. I pretty much just sat and listened for this was only the third time W has gone and it was my sixth. The MC was simply trying to get us on the same page. He asked W 10 times if she wanted out of the marriage but she never really answered directly. He kept saying you must let H know so he is not just hanging around on false hope.
.... What do you guys think should I keep DBing or just move on?
What I think, is that you should never, ever, go to that "marriage counsellor" again.
Sounds more like a "divorce counsellor" to me.
"are you ready to get divorced? come on, spit it out, so we can make some 'progress'"
HUH????
very very bad MC.
Not all MC's are equally good. It is not neccessarily a positive thing, to go to "A marriage counsellor". You need to find a good one. One that is marriage-positive, for starters.
yuck.
Anyways.... as far as "keep DBing or more on"...
Whether you decide to keep working on your marriage, is up to you. It's about your own set of morals, and values. How much do YOU value marriage, and marital vows? Dont let others make that determination for you.
Last edited by Dom R; 02/12/0809:21 PM.
My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D. Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M. 3 wonderful sons caught in the middle
I never want to see that guy MC again. I just feel since we told the kids I feel like we are done.I value my marrage more than anyhing in the world! I want my baby back but she seems so far gone. I am currently trying "last resorts" and detaching more. My wife is also being so mean to me. She states the meanest things she can possiblily think of. She will accept no help from my psycologist or anyone esle. I don't think she will go to another MC again. I took my vows and plan on honoring them.
I VALUE MY MARRAGE AND DO NOT WANT TO GET DIVORCED!!!
I just feel low on energy and need to recharge. Also discouraging is she is talking to her lawyer about separation today! Thanks for your thoughts Dom, they are very supportive and helpful to me. I also need to stop smothering! Your thoughts?
I agree with DOM. She got pushed into a corner and came out blasting.
If you want to keep it together, you need to give her tremendous space right now. Just put yesterday in the rear-view mirror. With time the day and session will fade.
Well still trying hard. She came in and helped change my sheets on my bed today, asked me how i felt and what my day looked like.I moved out of the bedroom Sunday which seems to be working well and giving her space.I think it showed a lot of respect for her on my side. I like having my own room and space. My family & friends has been very supportive whuch is great. I am very nervous about her talking to her lawyer about seperation and money issues. Working hard on detaching, "last resort" but having trouble with GAL with all the Kids activities and work.
