Sorry your H was such an a$$ at the concert but I give you a high five for sticking up for yourself (and your M). It's karma that he was talking to someone who looked like you and also HAD marriage problems.
He isn't going to know what he has in you, and D3, until he loses it. That not only makes him an a$$shole, but a dumb one.
My heart goes out to you with the alcoholic H. My H is still battling the same demon and everyday I ask myself what I want. Is this how I want to live????????
Very good observation, Yoyo! You're right, Sue has SO much more strength to stand strong for her M, while her H is a sick, weak, pathetic person.
Sue, you said:
Originally Posted By: SueS
I see what's going on and reading a few other's sitchs is like looking in a mirror. I get so mad reading about what other H/W's have done. But for me, my heart is having a tough time accepting things.
I wondered what you meant by the last line. Are you thinking "ultimatum time" here? That's how it sounded to me. Please remember that there IS a middle ground between "Shape up or ship out." You can let him do his thing while you keep working on yourself - Time and Patience, right?
Oh, and have a SPECTACULAR birthday - preferably without Lunkhead along to spoil the fun!!!
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
Saffie!! I've missed you! I'll email you soon. I hope you're doing well.
Joie, always nice to see you pop on. Yes, the alcoholism is hard to deal with. I understand your feelings of wondering if it's how you want to live.
Rob, Well, I'm not ready to give an ultimatum. I guess it's just that at times I feel like I'm ready to separate at the very least, just to get away from the pain. I don't know what it's like to separate so I can't say that it would be easier. I just know that it's hard being here with him everyday and I've had a really tough time being able to even things out for myself while watching him go up and down. Does that make sense?
Hi Mark!! Thanks to everyone for the birthday wishes. Just a few hours left and I'll no longer be in my 30's!!
I did go out and do something for myself tonight. I've been wanting new glasses for a long time. I love myself in contacts, but I had to do the practical thing for now and just buy new glasses. The contacts will come soon. I do like the new glasses though, smaller that what I have and much lighter. Now to get a new hair cut.
SueS
ME: 42, H: 42, D6 Together: 18 yrs. Married: 15 yrs. Attended Retrouvaille - December 2009 Status: Working on it day by day
Happy Birtday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday dear SUE, Happy Birthday to you.........
You have joined the fourties.........it can be a great place to be. Life starts at 40 don't they say?
Hope you have a fantastic day. If H does his old Lunkhead, (as Rob would say), routine then just tune him out and keep on having a good day......you deserve it.
((((((((((BIG HUGS)))))))))
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
I hope it is a wonderful one. Do LOTS of fantastic things for yourself - work out (always a good PMA booster for me!), get a massage, go to the salon for a new 'do, have a yummy dinner, and treat yourself to that too-many-calories dessert!
And remember, you DESERVE every one of those indulgences!
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
