I really believe that she is on a downward slope through this. I don't think that she sees Bad Friend much any more and she no longer works with the other people that encouraged this. It is just her an OW now. I also know that she has money problems and that she has a lot of pressure on OW to drive her and the kids around. Something also went wrong the other day but I don't know what that was. She is also having performance issues at work (very unusual for her) All is not well in paradise.
I don't think this is over but I think it is progressing.
My prayers are there for you buddy. I have shared that you have a situation like mine with my Wed morning bible study, although they don't know the details, i.e. they only know that my W has left, nothing more. And they are praying for you as well.
Heading out to church with my kids. Praying for everyone here!
Last edited by missmyfriend; 01/27/0804:37 PM.
Me:56, W:51 D:26,S:24,S:22 Married:18 Bomb 9/27/06 Separated 11/27/06 Divorced 10/6/08 Leaving it up to God
MMF, I think she talks to the kids that way because they are bringing her guilt and she wants them to stop. Although, this is a terrible thing to say to an 8 and 5 year old.
I have thought same thing about W thinking she has 2 marriages. That is one of the reasons that I think that the A will have to end before the sitch really progresses and I think that it will progress relatively quickly when it does end. I'm prepared to be patient until then.
I have a feeling that your W is going to sit and stew in her own mess until a certain point where she realizes that she has to return to her family. At that point, she'll come back fast and furious. I don't think the level of contact that you have right now will make any difference in this. I think she will wake up one day and say enough of this crap. The fact that her and OW are coming to an end is a good start.
M35 W37 S9 D6 M12 yrs Know 15 yrs Bomb 1/28/07 My Sitch Failure is the opportunity to start again more intelligently - Henry Ford
Your patience in dealing with her and your ability to stay upbeat is amazing. mmf gave a great visual of her haning over the cliff. As hard as it is for the kids to hear "not going to happen", being wishy washy IMO would be worse. I would prefer a hug and an I love you so much. Just me.
I think her not having the support of BF and others she was working with may help her on her way.
Well, It's 1 year today since the bomb. More importantly, as of today W is able to file for D (Canadian law says you have to wait 1 year). I'm pretty uneasy today thinking about what W will do. I know it means nothing in the long term but I can't seem to help worrying about it.
When I picked up the kids on Sunday W was wearing a new ring on her ring finger and she had moved the ring she was wearing there over to another finger. I have no idea what that means, it was an ugly ring though with a black stone in the centre and some small diamonds around it. OW was also there when I picked up the kids. W is getting a little more bold about that. I didn't actually see her, but she was one room away and W went in to that room and said something to her and she answered.
At 1 year in I am still fully confident that our marriage will be restored. I am more confident than this day last year. I can also see changes in myself so that is a good thing. I am a little worried about how bad things will have to get before it happens though. However maybe that is just my uneasiness of today talking because really our R is gradually getting better.
M35 W37 S9 D6 M12 yrs Know 15 yrs Bomb 1/28/07 My Sitch Failure is the opportunity to start again more intelligently - Henry Ford
