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LOL!!! Ok last night I'm sitting there with a bunch of friends and it hits mean exactly what you meant! (I hadn't read this response yet!). I just had a little chuckly to myself and realized what a blond moment I was having!!

Either way the flirting sounds great. I wish I could flirt with my H but things are SO not that way with us.

When I drop something or am playing with my D on the floor I try to make sure he gets a good look at me from behind! I've lost all of my pregnancy weight and then some (thanks to the bomb diet) and am looking better than I did before I got pregnant.
I hope he's noticing whether he shows it or not!
Thanks for the explanation!
J~

Made it through the frist day of 2008. Kept reminding myself all day to lower expectations. H showed up about 45 min. later than he said he would this morning. Had me worried a little since all the drunks were out last night and the roads were bad today. I had already started most of the food for lunch w/ his parents. H got on the computer. His feet were cold so I went and found his slippers that he hasn't used since spring. No thank you. H ended up going to lay down in "our" bed around noon.

ILs got here about 1:00. Had D wake up H around 1:15. He came down and got on the computer. Didn't really offer help in the kitchen. We sat down to eat a little after 1:30, but H stayed on the computer which is in the room right next to dining room. MIL told him twice to come eat and he finally did. I cleaned up w/ help from ILs. H came out to the kitchen to see if I needed help when I was almost done. ILs ended up staying for a few hours which H slept half of.

H got some leftovers ready to take w/ him. He said he would eat some tonight and take some for lunch. That was weird because he doesn't take his lunch even once a year. I don't know if the food was that good or what.

H said he wouldn't be stopping before work in the morning as he thought we would all be in bed. After he saw the snow in the drive he said maybe he would come clean the drive. I said that wouldn't be necessary, I could do it but I would appreciate him making sure there was gas in the blower. I hate doing the drive, but it is something I need to show I can do.

H was very quiet today. Not sure if it was because he is still sick or he was wishing he was starting the new year w/ someone else. H did do one little flirt w/ me. I was surprised and his parents were nearby so I couldn't respond. I guess I should take that as a big positive.

I have been thinking about what I need to do differently this year. I realize I need to start putting myself first a lot more often.

LOL I make sure my rear is facing H when I bend over too. I have put my bomb weight back on. I am afraid to weigh myself after the holidays. Although my beautiful wedding rings and anniversary ring are flopping around on my hands, so I guess I haven't put on too much.

Score some tough A-- points for me. Went out to clean the snow off the drive this morning. When H said last night he would stop in the morning and do it I said that wasn't necessary as long as there was enough gas I could do it. H said there would be enough. Wrong. The blower stopped as I was almost done. I figured out the problem after not being able to start and keep it running. I added gas and finished. Opps! H just called and when I told him he said the gas needed oil mixed in it. I guess H should have told me that last night.

After blowing the drive I was pumped to go. I decided I wanted to be able to park my car in the two car garage this winter. I wasn't able to last year because of H's canoe, kayak and a bunch of junk. The year before H put them up so I could get my car in. I guess I should have known last year when he didn't do that after I asked that we were in trouble. So I hauled his canoe up out of the way, moved the kayak and all the junk. Now I'll be able to get my car in. I can't wait to see what H says when he stops by this evening. I am guessing H will be worried that I didn't properly stow his toys.

Anyway I'm proud of myself for doing it and I'm looking forward to throwing all the junk out when spring comes. I am going to do a lot of tossing around here in the spring.

I had to chuckle when H stopped by the house tonight. H pulled in the drive, so no car then backed out. A few seconds later my cell rings and H asks where I am. I said I'm home and H asked where the car was. I said it is in the garage, I kicked butt today and moved some stuff around. I also said you might want to check and make sure I have your kayak in there ok. H checked it out then check on the snowblower and put in the correct gas. When he came in he didn't really say much about the garage. I think I asked if the kayak was ok and he said yes. I told him when I went out this morning and cleaned 8in of snow off my car I decided I wasn't doing that all winter. I bit my tongue and didn't say like I had to all last winter. H didn't really respond other than a nod.

H didn't really come in and sit down much. He stood in the kitchen and ate some leftovers and we chatted a little. Gave hime some meds I picked up for him today. Also gave him a calendar for the month. Discussed him spending time w/ Ds tomorrow and the weekend. I am going to see a movie tomorrow that I have been wanting to see. It will be my first time going alone. Anyway H and I did a little joking/flirting while he was here. Seems to be a little of that each day lately. I am encouraged by it but I know I need to keep the expectations low.

Hey Lizzy,
Good for you for cleaning the garage and taking a chance with the gas on the lawn mower. I've had a couple things I've had to deal with that didn't go exactly as planned and it was H who looked bad, not me. I got the A effort and he got the F for neglecting his responsibilities!

My H doesn't EVER say anything good to me when I do these things for myself. Not when I put up the Christmas lights myself or got my tree or anything. Yesterday I had taken all the decorations off the tree and it was standing there ready to be taken out. H asked if I wanted him to take it out and I said sure. Of course, he left without doing it. So today I did it myself. You think he said anything about it? Nope. It's like he can't even force himself to pay me a compliment or acknowledge when I've done something.

Well Lizzy...good for you! Doesn't it feel great when you do these things? It is so empowering and it inspires you to do more.
Good for you with the movie too!
The flirting seems encouraging.
J~

Thanks Jenny. I have to get the tree down too. It looks so pretty that I don't want to take it down, but if you breathe on it there is a shower of needles. My MIL looked at it the other day and studied it w/out saying anything. She has given us a TON of ornaments over the years and none of them were on the tree. It has snowflakes my mom made and then glass santas and snowmen. The Ds and I love the homey look. We had planned to put up our artifical tree for the other ornaments, but never got to it. I told MIL this so hopefully I didn't offend her too much. I guess I could have said I would have done it if I didn't have to leave my house two evenings a week so your son can play dad without me making him uncomfortable.

Today I'm wondering if I am in countdown mode. I have one month left of the 3months I asked H to wait before any legal action. I don't know that he will fill anything next month. H still hasn't come out and said he wants a D. The last time we talked at all about the R was 3 weeks ago and there was little discussion. H wasn't ready to move back and he still hasn't shown willingness to work on the R. As far as I know H still hasn't made any effort to find a place of his own. Staying w/ a friend still and stopping by everyday for clean clothes and to see Ds. Has anyone out there figured out yet how to read the WAS's mind?

Do you think he still remembers the 'wait 3 months' conversation? I'm of the mind that if he wanted to file, he would have just filed already. Your H has it pretty easy right now, so I can't imagine he'd want to 'rock the boat'.

Maybe three months ago I asked W if she would wait before making any decisions - She went nuts, screamed at me, told me I was controlling and that she'd do what she wanted. Of course, she hasn't done a damn thing...

I was just reading your post when H called my cell. I didn't answer and let it go to vm. Then when I tried calling him back it went right to his vm. I guess he called D then. Didn't know she was at a friends. H was planning to stop and see Ds before picking up the coworker he is staying with from the airport. Will then be gone for the day I guess.

I don't know if he remembers the conversation. I guess it would be one of the few things I said that he did remember. Well, besides all the evil things I have ever said. (Those are burned to his brain.) He actually didn't get mad which is amazing because apparently I'm a controlling person just like you. Please don't tell him he has it easy Brit. He will tell you that you are wrong about that, at least he told me that.

As for would he really file........Hmm.......that would actually take some real thought and action. So I might be safe for awhile. I tried to feel him out today when I was going to look at cell phones. Asked if he planned to stay on my family plan if I renewed for three years. H told me if he changed plans that D10 could have his phone. Hmm, change because of work or change because of leaving me?!?!?!?!?