I'm getting close to the point of taking mine off when I see her, but wearing it at other times. Feeling closer to a last resort lately. I'm afraid that if I don;t have it on it wil just make it easier to justify what she is doing. She can move to D convincing herself that I have given up. I'm not confident enough yet to act as if completely...
I do and he does... atleast he does when he is around me or at work...LOL
me:29, H 33 Bomb- 11/06/2006 I came home from work to find that he had moved out into an apartment. next day he says he wants to work on our marriage but will not return until he feels right. kids-4 m-10 years T- 13 years another Bomb-Sept '07 OW confirmed...
I wear mine for me and my kids. I'm still married.
I don't care what she thinks.
This is a common discussion and it is a personal choice. MRsH has good reasons for not wearing hers.
As for me... I did not remove my rings. I am married. My ring is a sign of the commitment I made. Whether Sweetheart was choosing to honour his commitment was irrelevant to my commitment.
Wearing rings is much one of the moer subtle Standing tactics. It doesn't mean you are Standing or waiting for them to move home or that oyu will take them back. They may assume these meanings, but that is their problem. And such meanings can be assumed from more obvious actions.
Combine subtle Standing with Self-Focus GAL techniques. I showed Sweetehart consistency. I told him I would not remove it and he saw I honoured that. It also served as a mild reassurance that I was there for him.
But the message may no longer be subtle if you removed your ring and then chose to put it back on--it's a much bolder statement that way...tread carefully in that situation.
I cut mine off the night he left. Yes cut, wouldn't come off. It was so traumatic I collapsed to the floor as a result. I decided that ring was for a marriage now shattered. If we do stay married I will get a new ring or I will have the old one fixed. To me the ring is a symbol of union. I can't wear it if he has his off, which he does. He keeps it in a draw at his studio.
I've been looking back through your posts (so many!!) but can't find out what your current situation is. Together? Apart? D? Working on it? Just curious. Thanks.
Me 39 H 45 T13 M11 D6.5 S4 ILYBNILWY July 07 OW e-mails found 12/15/07 H moved out 3/15/08
My H took his off even before he left. He made up the excuse that it was bothering him while working.
Should I be wearing my rings if I am standing for my M?
Anyone who follows my sitch knows that other posters keep telling me to live my life as if he is never coming back so wearing my rings I think would prevent me from doing that.
Am I making the right choice here? Or is there no right choice?
