Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums We're separated--What Now? FLTC: FROM IRAQ

FLTC, I feel for you bro. At times I feel the exact same things..... Hang in there, it will get better.....

FLTC, those things frost us all. I'm with you on the question of how can they...? But you know what, we'll drive ourselves insane trying to understand it. So the best thing to do is quite worrying about it.

It's time to start finding the positives in every little thing. Sure you won't be able to tuck the kids in every night but you know what, when you are able to tuck them in, it's that much more special. Same thing with everything else.

Bottom line here, life is precious, a gift and we MUST remember this and always enjoy every second of it!!

FLTC, before I separated I had the exact same feelings and thoughts as you! The idea of not being able to tuck my babies in every night just tore my heart out. But, you know what, it wasn't as bad as I had imagined it would be. The hurt really is managable, honest!!!! I remember one night crying and D10 asked me what was wrong, and I said "there are so many good memories in this house, sweetie" and she replied "soon you will have good memories in your new house, Daddy" Wow, what a kid.
FLTC , it will work out...really

Thanks, guys. Some days you just remember back to "Camelot", when you had all the family together and how great that was. It was always "enough" for me, even though the last few years have been tough. Divorce under the circumstances we're in is awful. To us, none of this warrants blowing a family up!

I really KNOW everything you guys tell me is true, but I can't rave and rant at anyone here....I'm their leader....lead by example...can't let them see that part of me!

I do appreciate you guys!

Good to go. Keep venting here. I agree with your approach!

I remember when you were deciding to go or not to go on this op. It was a tough choice but probably the correct one. I think if you chose otherwise you would be in a small apt hating life and not performing the job you trained so long for.

Sooner or later some of your soldiers will know but not know. Many of them are in the same boat and doing the same since they feel like you do the are more important things currently at hand.

Keep venting.

Yes agreed best to vent here, but hey we'd like to hear something positive from you once and a while too.

Surely you can come up with three very positive things.

FLTC,
Have you started that savings account for YOU and your future???
(I know I promised I wouldn't nag you about that, but you just need some friendly nagging now and then!!!)

Can you foresee getting a house or apt near where the family house is now and the kids can walk back and forth easily? Can you foresee selling that house and you end up with 2 smaller places? Maybe you can decide to live near each other so the kids can be in the same school district no matter who they are with. Will you even be stationed in the same place when you return from Iraq? Who's to say that the kids won't want to be at your new place more than at their current location? Mom's don't always get custody!!!! You can hire a lawyer and listen to him/her (Do as I say, not as I do!)

Well, unfortunately, housing is so expensive where I live that selling the house would mean a move to another town or city. With my kids firmly entrenched in school, that doesn't seem right to them right now, either. I look at apts. online that are withing 15 minutes of where I live, and they are apartment houses, not dank, garage apartments like I lived in, so that might be better, when it comes to that. ahhhh. the savings...uh...um...uhhhhh............err.

Matilda, I'll nag him.

Where are those 3 positives and what he devil you doing about saving money for you?