I have no idea what will happen with me, H, OW, and OW's H, but my gut tells me I am in for hard times...
My gut tells me you alreadty have been having hard times and this is finally a change... and you *may* have further hard times, but eventually you will finally be able to move forward.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
You know, I said earlier that if OW's H would have told me this months ago (that he was divorcing her), I would have been a frantic mess, up all night, worrying, stressing, etc. I have what I think is resignment now, a feeling of just letting things happen and then I can decide what I want. Months ago, them getting a divorce would have been the worst thing ever, now maybe its a 'shake up' that we all need in some way....
I'm not sure what to make of your current turn of events. It sound's like things are headed for change again. I just wanted to add that I too am thinking about you and praying that this will portend the start of you being able to regain control of your life again. I think you know it won't be easy, however it turns out, but maybe it won't be as bad as being stuck in limbo either.
LWB, Maybe this will be whats needed to shake things up and get the fog to lift. Don't know if that is the direction it will go, but you know you have plenty of support here regardless of the path the situation takes.
Originally Posted By: tryingtoholdon
I am sorry but I think it is utter crap that ANYONE should have to pay maintenance or alimony to a spouse that has cheated!! Are you sure your laws state that you have to do this? If I were the Ow's husband right now I would be of the all's fair in love and war. I would be looking into ways to make her chosen life difficult.
Not sure about the laws in other states, but I did bring this up with my attorney. Apparently an A has very little impact on distribution of property or alimony. You would think that there would be some repurcusions for the WAS, but it does not appear to normally turn out that way. At least from a legal perspective. Doesn't seem fair does it? WAS takes it upon themselves to cheat and then the LBS has to pay when they split up?
