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I'm also worried that like RedHead said, it would affect his career. For my kids sake, I don't want to do that.
Also, he's going to be doing enough stuff that he is a a**hole. I don't need to help him out any in their eyes! He keeps telling me, 'tell them their dada loves them and that i'm a good father.' and everytime, i tell him, 'i can tell them that until i'm blue in the face and they won't believe a word i say if ur not there backing it up.'

also, when i told him i wouldn't be meeting his lawyer, he pulled the whole, 'i wish i were dead! my life is horrible! everyone would be so much better off if i wasn't here!' bs. so my reply, as always, 'you made the decisions. you have to take responsibility for them. you can chance your future if you don't want it to be this way. but only you are able to do that. if its broken, anything can be fixed if you really want it to.'

So I had a great time over Thanksgiving with H's family! I had a couple rough times, but I got over them. Just with thoughts and such. Nothing happened to cause them. He did pretty much ignore me the whole time until last night. He saw me and my BIL goofing around tripping each other and such and he decided to join in. All day today, that's what he did. Trip me, push me, bump into me. It was very similar to a little boy in school with a girl he likes. He even sat on the couch with me while I was holding D and he had S in his lap and put his arm around the back of the couch and practically touching my shoulders. We had 2 people actually come in and give us a funny look. Like blantant funny looks, they actually would walk in the room, stop and look at us and stay there for a minute, then walk away.
I never pushed him, I didn't show him any affection, but I did tease back. I spent more time with his family than he did tho. When they weren't working on the roof, he either slept, watched tv or played video games. He played a few games of poker with us also.
Jarhead, it's funny actually, because he did in fact ask me for a quickie! I told him, yeah, meet me in the bathroom. He asked what was up with the smart a** comment, I told him I wasn't going to do that. He asked why and I told him I explained that before.
As soon as we got in the van to leave, he started in with, it was a good thing he stopped working at 11 so we could leave early. He had told me he wanted to leave early because he had stuff he needed to get done for work. I told him, he was playing around just as much as I was. And I told him I had a good weekend, and he wasn't going to start messing it up. So he brought up later asking how we were going to do taxes this year. I asked him what he meant and he asked if he would claim one of the kids and I would claim the other. So I again told him, this was something we could talk about later, I don't want to ruin my good weekend with talking about that stuff. So we enjoyed the rest of the trip playing the Letter game and stuff. Then when we got home, he started flipping out because the neighbors had left the dogs out of their crate. I calmly told him it was ok, I had told them to do that during the day and crate at night. A little while later, I told him, thank you for inviting me and that I had a good time this weekend. He said he had fun too. After a while, he went to leave and said he would call me later.
Also a commercial came on in the car on the ride back and it was talking about your marriage and if you have problems with it and blahblahblah, even infidelity and such, call this number and they would send us their 12 cd program on how to improve or better your marriage. At the end of the commercial, he handed me his phone and I looked at it and didn't understand what he meant. So I asked him what he meant, did he want me to call the number or something? And he said, yeah! then said, it was a joke. I told him, I would be willing to, if he was ready. But he wasn't ready. and left it at that. He didn't say anything for a while, then we played the Letter game.
Hope everyone had a great thanksgiving!

So this morning he starts the morning off bright and early at 8:30 with a phone call regarding money. starts yelling about something stupid, i can't even remember what it was.
calls back not even an hour later. same thing.
calls back an hour later. says i need to stop asking his mom to babysit for me when i need to do something. he can watch the kids for me. so he would be here today so i could go to my dr's appt. and that we need to sit down this week and discuss things, like when we're coming back after the holidays, how we're going to handle splitting everything up and such. i told him, we're going to do it his way, so he can stop worrying about it. but i would not be going down to sit with his lawyer and i would not be signing any kind of agreement without having someone else look at it. he got all pissy. started yelling. i told him to knock it off. there was no reason to yell and that's all he's done all morning is yell at me because everything i am doing is wrong. he asked what i had done wrong and i told him i didn't know! but obviously its something seeing as he has to yell about it! so knock it off and leave me alone! so he hung up the phone. then called back an hour later and told me he wouldn't be able to make it to watch the kids.
i still have yet to figure out what i did wrong that he had to yell about. so i gave up trying to.

Well... somebody pissed in his Wheaties huh?

Is he on medication? I know the WAS's are loopy, but he sounds a little off to me.

If he's in that frame of mind, I'm glad he's not watching the kids.

Maybe you need to employ the warning system. Warn him once about yelling.. if he does it again, simply hang up. No discussion for an hour. Give him time to calm down and maybe screw his head on straight.

Sounds like he also may be trying to get some reaction out of you. Wonder if his family laid into him and he's acting out.

Cooky.. good job handling it though.

thanks jarhead. the warning system is a good idea. i know before he would make me mad and i would hang up, and it would really make him mad. so he would call right back and tell me not to hang up the phone on him, it was rude. so that's one of the things i've stopped doing is hanging up the phone on him. even when i can't stand to reply to him, i don't do it. he has done it and i simply call him back and tell him not to hang up the phone, it's rude.
but i think your idea is a good one. i think i'll tweak it alittle bit. give him a warning, then if he does it again. simply tell him, you're yelling, i don't appreciate it. call me back after you've calmed down. goodbye. then hang up. that way, i'm not technically hanging up the phone. i'm just not waiting for him to tell me bye.
he is definitely a little off! when he does watch the kids, he either sits them in front of the tv with him, or they watch tv while he plays online poker or ps3. he can't get on my comp anymore tho, so poker is out. and he took his ps3 with him so he doesn't have that anymore. most of the time when i come back from doing whatever, they're all sitting in front of the tv or S is somewhere making a mess while H and D are in front of the tv.

I did it jarhead! he's been calling me all day and iming me about stuff. the last few times he's been getting upset and loud about stuff. so the last time, i told him, i was tired of him yelling. call me when he calms down and wants to talk. goodbye. and hung up!!!
i haven't heard back yet. it's been about 20 minutes. he's supposed to be coming over to see the kids for alittle while for lunch.
he text me last night and told me he was sorry for how he acted earlier, losing his kids in 5 days isn't the greatest feeling in the world, but he shouldn't take it out on me. when i didn't respond to his text, he called me and asked if there was a walmart in fl. duh! he said he would be ordering S's christmas present online and asked if i could pick it up for him and wrap it.