Hey Sue, that's great your H came by for the pizza. Perhaps this should be offered more frequently? Maybe Sue should practice different recipes and enlist her H in being a guinnea pig? Followed by games, of course...
I know so many people are having down times, but I want to share the good times I am having..I went to Walmart saw a coffee table..wondered what it could be like for $50..bought it, s put together..really quite nice..does not match end tables..they had end tables too..so when dd came home and I said" I don't know if I should get them with out asking your dad" she nearly had a fit..said" he does not live here..you don't need his permission" I know I don't but told her it is still his home too, and i usually would not buy larger items without talking about it..so she called him and he was just laughing..said to her "I suppose she would like to come and look at it..said he did not care if I got them(which has always been his reaction..just wish he would have taken a more active role in buying house stuff)she also told him she and I were going to go to a movie..he asjked which one.. she asked if he wanted tot go.He came over said the table was nice..we all went to get the 3 end tables and went to movie. While we were in the store he debated on getting one for his appartment..my heart sank..why would he if he's going to come home..someday? He kinda laughed and said "It really was almost too high..(then he stopped..then he continued)at your house..our house" I said "your house" he said ,again "our house".said his sofa was so low.
So it was another step of what??Is he coming around..just wish it could be the two of us..but it feels safer when our kids are around? He really seems like his old self.
Our minsiter had a wonderful sermon today..almost like she is writing them for h and I, only he was not there to hear it..it was about the snakes and serpents...getting rid of the poisons in your life..letting go for the past is the past..nothing you can do about that..live life right now.It hit home and that is what I am working on..letting go of stuff that overloads your mind and body.
Working with mil in kitchen was ok..she is so bossy sometimes..when h came in to take some lunch stuff home, she was insisting he out it in another bag,,he said no a dozen times and walked away..she mumbled "stubborn" and I know I should not have, but I said "He is anything but stubborn"..has always kinda done what she tells him.
So Sue, You didn't like my TV episode like cliffhanger? So much for maybe making a movie from my story,
All kidding aside, just dropping by for a quick visit. I'm glad to hear you are keeping the doors of communication open...with that there is always hope.
I just spent some time catching up on your situation and want to send a big hug.
You're inspiring me to be more patient.
My H just moved out again -- he'd been living at home for months but the other chick started to pursue him again. He got lured toward her, started to be hostile to me, I confronted him, he bolted.
I am sad about it, it is a set-back.
But I'm recovering a clear mind, and I need to read about others in this situation and how they handle things.
You are holding a candle to light my way, did you know?
I'm glad you notice the little things that are positive. I'm glad your H smiles at you.
You deserve to do very nice things for yourself. Your strength is contagious.
Yikes..slipped to page 3!!!Been busy..and happy for a change.
Bridget...thank you so much for the nice post..I have not kept up on your threads, but will read them and respond. I am sorry your h has been "lured" away again..so you seem to know what you have to do for you. I still struggle with wondering what h is doing, and wonder if he comes home, will I be able to allow the freedom that for so many years he did not have...I have so learned the patience thing..will that last ..I hope so..as each day goes by, I feel like I can be ok alone, if it comes to that. I am moving on to doing fun things that I have put on hold for a year or more(painting kitchen cupboards, fininshing curtains for bath)things like that..fun things..I am going to plant flowers this year, as last year I did some, but kept wondering when h was going to leave, or if he was having an a or not. So you have to make an effort to move on with your life..as I have said before, you can sink or swim..I see divorce every day in my job and these people are so angry and bitter...even the ones that are d, can't seem to let it go and move on..make themselfs happy. What is the purpose of hurting your spouse or x spouse? The kids are the ones getting hurt.
h called me this a.m. and asked if I could pick him up at his moms and take him to motel where his sister left her car while going on a bus tour..of course I said I would..he thanked me as he was getting out..2nd time of thanking me for something in 25 years!!!!Last night he called and wondered what I was doing..I said nothing, he said they were practicing for Easter program to be held this Sunday, wondered if I wanted to come and watch(it is a tradition that I statred going on practice night a few years ago).Friday night is also a practice night and then a bunch always goes out..at first I just about jumped up and down thinking he was finally asking me to do something, but he wondered if I could bring a couple t- shirts that were still here that his sister was going to borrow. He has never been one to expect me to do things for him, or get things for him, yet would he have called and asked if I wanted to come to church if he did not want me to bring something?? I don't know...guess I will have to just watch and see. I do know that he is feeling very good about his life right now..his active part in our church is very important to him.
He still has a few weeks left in bowling with the ff..I asked him if he was going to bowl next year, he did not know..the old me would have put in a dig about her new mf taking his place, which I'll bet ya he will, but I said nothing. That should really show h that the *itch was using him for what ever attention he was showing her, and not the great friend that he thinks she is.
Followed by games, of course...
Enjoy these times and show him what a great woman he is missing LIVING with!