GD, my original posts were July 1st & 2nd under Walk Away Wife Syndrome titled "Wife moved out Friday". What I did is make you one of my watched users, then it lists all your posts, so I can follow up from the beginning, I've read your sitch.
I know how you feel when you say everything is stagnant. The same for me, although my wife has called me 3 times since yesterday to ask how I was doing since I lost my job, I thought that was nice. I told her this morning when she dropped my son off, "Thanks for checking up on me", and she smiled very warmly as she backed out of my driveway.
Here I sit, out of work, feeling a little low, but I'm not going to carry that on long (I hope). I will take a little break this weekend, then try to get back in the saddle Monday, re-do my resume, look around online, call a couple of contacts, maybe this was supposed to happen to me to take my mind off my W a little.
Not to whine about it, but I feel (as I'm sure you do too) that I'm a good guy who's been kicked while I'm down, the only difference between our sitch's is that my W is by herself, no EA of PA, and she doesn't want one, but I'm not financially set as you are, I'm okay, no debt aside from my mortgage and I've got a few bucks in the bank, but I need to work fairly soon. But nonetheless, we have both been hit hard with burdens. GD, Before your current sitch, did you think you had the world by the ba!!s? I felt that way, I felt blessed, lucky, fortunate, I want to get that feeling back. I also want to help others, I have started to, but I want to be as kind to others as you have been to me, helping me through it, I feel like I'm on that 'ol roller coaster ride again, I had just gotten off it, now I'm back on. If you want any advice from me, please ask, sometimes just bouncing things off each other really helps. Your words "Pity Party" was very well put, it has stayed with me.
LOST, are you LOST?, Gone Dancin' & I want to help you,
"We're here for a good time, not a long time" ________________________________________
M:48 W: 43 S;20, S;10 Married: 14 Years / Together 17 Years Bomb Dropped: 2/4/07 Separated: 6/29/07 D to be filed by my W soon.
I am here. It has been a couple of hectic days. Two kids, two jobs and trying to find a dress for a wedding this weekend that is super formal-killin me!!! tonite will be day 3 of the dress search. I was also having trouble with my internet at home...finally got that resolved last nite around 11pm Grrrr!
I appreciate all your comments, opinions, and so on, really I do.
GG - If it doesn't kill you it will only make you stronger. Someone really down and out told me that not too long ago and I realized that things weren't really that bad. Sure I am hurtig today but everyday I hurt jsut a little bit less.
PS: It'll take alot more than what you have thrown at me so far to scare me off...
M: 34 H: 32 M: almost 6 years S: 2 yrs D: 4 yrs Together: 8 Known him: 15 years I walked away: April 1st Wanted back: May 1st!!!!!
Ok...so it has taken me four hours to finally get the internet up and rrunning. How frustrated am I? Grrrrr!
So as I speak my H is packing up our house and he is moving tomorrow to 'his' new house. This makes me very sad. We built a beautiful home in a really nice neighbourhood and I sort of feel like the sale of the house is the last thing we had. It was, really. He bought a little house in a not so nice area of town and he takes possession tomorrow. I cant bear to even think about it.
He was with a friend tonite when he dropped liam to me at the school and usually when it comes to the house...he hugs me because he knows how upset it makes me. NOT TONITE...I'm wondering if that was because his friend was there and he is trying to be tough. I dont know what he has told them.
I am going to ottawa tomorrow for the weekend so that should keep me distracted. When I moved out he went to Niagara Falls with the kids. I guess thats what you do eh? Feels a bit like running away but whatever. It hurts to think about him having a housewarming and that I know I wont be invited. I guess really all of this hurts.
It is crummy because I have been feeling so positive the last couple of days. Dont' know if i'm up or down sometimes. Crappy roller coaster...I WANT OFF!!!
M: 34 H: 32 M: almost 6 years S: 2 yrs D: 4 yrs Together: 8 Known him: 15 years I walked away: April 1st Wanted back: May 1st!!!!!
I feel you moving to a different place. I see it. Don't carry the guilt of the house sale. You can build a better house. I am a little dissapointed that you have had no responce to what I said in my last post. You know the way. I just feel that you don't wanna "Do it" I will say it right now.. Your husband was the WAS. Not in action but in what he did and is doing. He is proving a point. You have to keep in mind.. He can't change who he is. He is waiting to see you "In the Rain". You started the roller coaster. My question becomes where does the roller coaster end? My answer.. Right where it started. I gotta start reading my own damn posts!!
Relax Eat Think Act normal React.. Smartly. Do something different. Emulate. Do Work.
hey forrest. Maybe I missed the question. Could you ask it again.
Funny you would ask about my love language. I just started reading that book last week so I will let you know as soon as I do. I am in about 5 different self help books right now...building quite a library.
What do you mean by my H is the WAS? Do you mean NOW he is or that he ALWAYS was? I'm a bit confused!!!
Help me understand.
M: 34 H: 32 M: almost 6 years S: 2 yrs D: 4 yrs Together: 8 Known him: 15 years I walked away: April 1st Wanted back: May 1st!!!!!
It is kinda what I pointed out in the beginning of your post. You got seperated. You started your ride. He was still standing in line. All the issues you thought you were leaving behind are still right there when you get back. He is still standing in line. I like the metaphores (Spelling) in life.
Yes I think he was the WAS in the relationship. Now and then. You have to lead the way. You will have to be the leader in your own stitch. You effected the change.
I once read..
A woman marries a man expecting he will change. And he does not.
A man marries a woman expecting she will not change. And she does.
That says alot.
Relax Eat Think Act normal React.. Smartly. Do something different. Emulate. Do Work.
I just wanted to check in, I am exhausted with my own deal, but will try to add something tomorrow. A house is material, what you have in front of you is real love, should you both choose to own up to it. How have you addressed the issues to make you happy and in turn attract him back?
