goinginsane. stop what you are doing and go your local ER. This is not something to be messing with. If you do nothing else SEEK MEDICAL HELP NOW. As someone who has had to walk in to those scenes you must seek help now. Call in sick, whatever but SEEK HELP NOW. If you don't feel you can make it to a medical facility dial 911 or 112 (not sure where you live).
As an EMT of 10 yrs experience I don't need to paint a gory picture here. But trust me you DON'T want to do this.
Last edited by lester; 09/17/0708:14 PM.
H 30 (me) W 28 Married 9 yrs 2 children EA found out on 7/5/07 ILYBNILWY 8/25/07 The unexamined life is not worth living -Socrates
GI, Here is a link to a site that identifies depression. Please take it. If your score is high they recommend that you get to the doctor immediately. Please do this.
Saffie, I would say chance are the divorce is going to go through. I can tell that this last month is going to real ugly. D is supposed to be final last week of October. If I understand your posting, her guilt and regrets will sometime after that.
It is very sad. She thinks the kids are doing just fine. I know they are resentful towards both of us for letting this marriage fall apart. 25 years.....her reason for leaving...she did not want to spend the rest of her life with someone that had clinical depression. Wonder if she would have left if I had cancer???
I am trying to act happy. She seems elated to be out of the house (7 months now). I am starting to GAL.
Keep up the GAL and act happy around her. I know how bad depression is; it's definately not something to be underestimated and it is also hard for those who have never experienced it but who live with someone who suffers from it to understand what you are going through. They just think you should get a grip and change your outlook - don't we all want to do that.
I am truly sorry for what you are going through but time is what will be what mend things for you. I wish I could give you a more satisfactory answer, but I can't.
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
Get on the correct medication and hopefully your perspective will change so that even if a year from now your W is still with OM, your PMA will be so good that you will be able to see a future without your W or a way of working toward getting back together. At the moment you are not able to do this because of the awfull place you are in.
Get professional help immediately. A year makes such a difference. How many times can I tell you I am living proof of this. 14 months ago I tried several ways to finish myself, overdoses, cutting etc. I stopped just short of driving my car full blast into a tree because I was too scared I might survive but be disabled. Just don't go there - today I am so glad to be alive, to have my family around me, to have my friends, to have my dear friends on these boards who understand what my pain is/ has been.
You have so much to live for. I know you can't see that now, but you have. You are one of God's children and you are your parents' child - none of them want you to die by your own hand prematurely. You can do so much with your life. Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
I saw the psychiatrist yesterday. She put me on Welliburtin. It's still too early to see if the meds will help but I still can't take the pain and agony. The only bright spot was my wife said yesterday there could be a chance she may want to come back at some point. If this is true, what can I do to keep her mindset like that?
Don't beg, plead, or show misery around her, move forward by getting control of your life and accepting it is your responsiblity to keep yourself happy not hers.
This I believe will give you the best chance!
Married:10 years D final 8/28/08 10 minutes is all it took Life goes on and DB was no small part in growing from the Divorce!
I am glad you went to see the psychiatrist. It will take a while - weeks - for the meds to kick in and even then they may need fine tweaking but it is definately the right thing to do. Try and get some counselling set up with a psychiatric counselor as well. The psychiatrist tends to deal with the drugs side of things whilst the psychiatric counselor will try to help you heal mentally.
Try and think what it was that made your wife say there may be a chance she may want to come back at some point. Did you tell her you had sought professional help? That might have made her think feel more positive about the future if you did - it may have shown her that you are taking positive action. Just try to be as positive around your wife as possible. If you need help while the medication is taking time to kick in then go back to your doctor - somthing like valium may help calm you in the interim period. The fact that your wife said what she said shows that there is hope.
(((((HUGS)))))
Saffie
Saffie me 46 H 46 M in 1986 D20,D18,S16,D13 H's A 01/05 to 07/06 H recommitted to M 07/06 renewed vows 09/06 Going from strength to strength
I have been on wellbutrin in the past. That was the most agreeable AD med for me. It will take about two weeks for you to notice a difference in your attitude. Make sure you get out and exercise each day. A brisk walk for a half hour will do wonders. You really need to go to the bookstore and get DR.
